tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-40414562737959507352023-11-16T00:39:27.103-06:00The Blonde MuleBorn stubborn, dyed blonde.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.comBlogger1314125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-17207003574817713722018-03-07T15:19:00.000-06:002018-03-07T15:19:29.513-06:00An Interview with Writer and The Porch CoFounder Susannah Felts<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Terrified, party of one. Have you ever had to write about one of your teachers? If so, please join me at my terror table. Today's bitch is not only my literal teacher, she is, as Oprah would say, my <i>teacher</i>. I met Susannah on the day of the Women's March when I took my first writing workshop with The Porch. On that day, in that workshop, Susannah was the first person I opened myself up to for feedback on my writing about 9/11. Neither of us knew it, but that day planted the seed of not only a friendship, but a personal essay 17 years in the making.<br />
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One of my favorite things about Nashville is that we have a literary center - and Susannah is responsible for that. Susannah and The Porch have taken me from blogger and storyteller to writer. My finest piece of writing is the personal essay on 9/11 that Susannah spent 8 weeks helping me edit and revise in her Personal Essay class. She will get a lot of exclamations marks after her name in the acknowledgments section of the book I hope to one day write. Meet my friend, my teacher, a Nashville treasure, Susannah Felts!<br />
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<b>What do you do and what is the name of your business?</b><br />
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Hi! I’m a writer and cofounder/codirector of <a href="http://www.porchtn.org/">The Porch</a>, a nonprofit literary arts organization in Nashville, TN.<br />
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<b>When did you first learn about this field of work? How did you know it was what you wanted to do?</b><br />
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Well, there’s the writing, and then there’s the whole literary center thing. First, the writing: I’ve been writing/wanting to write/not writing and feeling terrible about it/trying to figure out how to make any money at writing for pretty much forever if you roll all of that together. Wrote for fun as a kid and teen, got serious about writing in college, got equally more serious and more confused about writing in graduate school, entered an era of really torn-up feelings about writing after that... and figured out along the way that it was nothing I was ever going to kick, and I’m happier when I’m at least making a stab at it.<br />
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Writing has simply always been a central part of my identity. Sometimes that scares me. Like, what if I really try to dump it someday? Am I even capable of that? I’ve joked (as have others) that it’s like a chronic illness. My, that is upbeat.<br />
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The literary center thing: I taught as an adjunct college professor for many years. There were great times along the way, including some fabulous students, some of whom have become longtime friends. And I learned so much (and am still learning) from teaching. But I got to a point with adjuncting where we had to break up. In short, I dug the teaching, disliked the exploitive system. I’d always fancied the idea of teaching independently in the community, and when we moved to Nashville I began doing just that, quietly and on a very small scale, at my dining room table after my toddler went to bed and at a coffee shop on Sunday mornings. It was wonderful; it was just what I needed at the time. Plus: I met some incredible folks who I count among my friends today.<br />
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Meanwhile, I had become aware of literary centers across the United States; many bigger cities have them, and after a few years of teaching my coffee-shop and home-dining-table classes, I had an a-ha moment of sorts: Nashville needs a literary center. That’s what this could blossom into. It helped that I was seeing a real surge in creative entrepreneurism in the city, and that people from other cities were starting to move here in droves. All signs pointed to GO. And around then the stars aligned and I met Katie McDougall, who became The Porch’s cofounder/codirector. The timing couldn’t have been more right.<br />
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I didn’t know that founding a literary center was what I was working toward all those years when it felt like my path was a bit winding—when I was straddling, or hopping between, the worlds of academia and journalism. But when the time came, I realized, with a happy shiver, that everything I’d done had prepped me nicely for <a href="http://www.porchtn.org/">this adventure</a>. Which is not to say that I didn’t have to learn a ton on the fly about managing a nonprofit, because I certainly did. And oh boy, am I still learning.<br />
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<b>What is the best piece of business advice you’ve been given?</b><br />
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I’ve agonized a bit over the answer to this question, wishing I had the perfect anecdote from a mentor to share, or some sparkling tidbit of wisdom gleaned from a book or TED talk. Nope. There’s no doubt something—many somethings—I’m forgetting. But right now I keep coming back to my gut. How when I’ve listened to it, I’ve usually been happy with the results. I had a gut feeling (grounded in visible evidence) that Nashville could support a literary center, and so far that’s proven to be right. I think many women have a strong intuitive muscle, but to some degree cultural messaging has discouraged us from using it. Do your research, absolutely; then trust your well-informed vision and gut.<br />
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I also recall Lisa Lucas, ED of the National Book Foundation, posting something recently on Facebook about always approaching people with an attitude of kindness/openness, or something to that effect. That really stuck with me (um, despite the fact that I can’t remember her precise words). It’s easy to to be driven by assumptions in a rushed, unkind way. Give people an ear—a real ear—and a fair shake; give them the best attention you can muster. If you’re going to network—and we all should, despite any negative connotations of that word—be real about it. Slow down and be curious.<br />
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<b>Can you name the biggest lesson you’ve learned or that helped improve the way you work?</b><br />
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A no isn’t a forever no. It’s often a not-right-now. Even when it’s you saying no to yourself. It doesn’t have to be The End, Go Away, Goodbye. No can be healthy. I still have to re-learn this all the time.<br />
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<b>What would you do with two more hours a day?</b><br />
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Read more, write more, cook/bake a little more. I’d like to think that I’d attempt one of the dozens of craft projects I’ve thought longingly about over the past few years—I review lifestyle books for BookPage, which means I’m constantly elbow-deep in books about embroidery and kitchen lithography and paper flowers and granola recipes and so forth—but let’s be honest: the writing and reading would come first and take up the full two extra hours. If I can have three hours? Crafternoon, hopefully on the porch, with a beer in reach!<br />
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<b>What has been the biggest sacrifice you’ve made?</b><br />
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You know, there’s a flip side to every ‘sacrifice’ that makes nothing feel like much of a sacrifice to me. I sacrificed a full-time editorial job to go back to the hand-to-mouth existence of a freelance writer/adjunct teacher, but it never once felt like a loss. I’ve spent countless hours on getting The Porch up and running that could have been spent working on my own fiction, but this work feels nourishing and necessary to my writing life, too. I guess if there’s anything I’ve consistently missed out on in the interest of other goals and desires, it’s making much money. Or I’m just really lousy at that.<br />
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<b>What is your greatest success, or something you’re most proud of related to what you do?</b><br />
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It’ll be this novel I’ve been working on for years, if I can publish it. I’m proud that The Porch is thriving, making a difference in people’s lives. And I really love making connections between people and sharing info, even just little things like a book recommendation or an album to listen to or another local writer with whom you should probably be pals. I love it when I feel like an arts and culture connector—and I equally love being on the receiving end of that equation! Always curious. Always looking for the next new fascination.<br />
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<b>Do you have a morning ritual that helps you set the tone for the day?</b><br />
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I started to agonize over this one, too, wishing I had a really Instagrammy morning routine to share: this perfect tea in the perfect mug, that book I read a page from every morning, a beautiful journal written in with a favorite pen, some yoga pose or sniff of a personalized blend of essential oils, whatever. Again, nope.<br />
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Then I realized: I totally do have a morning ritual! And it looks like this: I wake up sloooowly--I’m not a jump-out-of-bed, bushy-tailed type. My husband, bless him, brings me coffee. And my daughter, who is 9, comes and gets in the bed with me for a little bit and we snuggle and chat while I drink about half my coffee (and then it’s usually time for all of us to get cracking). I absolutely love that this is how the days begin right now. I know it won’t be this way forever, maybe even not much longer, and that’s part of what makes it precious.<br />
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<b>How do you decompress at night?</b><br />
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Not gonna lie. A glass of wine or a beer is a likely part of this picture.<br />
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Also: Book. Couch. Phone (not talking, just scrolling). Too much phone. I wish I journaled at night.<br />
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<b>What helps when you’re stuck? Do you have a motto or quote that inspires/motivates you?</b><br />
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When stuck on something I’m writing, I give myself space to let my brain do background work (I think of it like apps that are running on your computer or phone while you’re doing something else). I’ll take anywhere from a half a day to a few days off, depending on deadlines, and go for a walk, listen to music, read. Reading someone else’s work has un-stuck me many, many times. That’s really the magic move.<br />
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I’m not a big motivational quote gal. Or maybe I just have a terrible memory for this sort of thing. But I can happily return again and again to the wisdom of Dani Shapiro in <i><a href="https://www.indiebound.org/book/9780802121417">Still Writing</a></i> and that of Elizabeth Gilbert in <i><a href="https://www.indiebound.org/book/9781594634727">Big Magic</a></i>. I came to Gilbert hesitantly, but I fell in love. There’s so much power in that book if you allow yourself to receive it. There, that’s my quota of woo-woo for the day.<br />
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Also: Right now, I’m reading <i><a href="https://www.indiebound.org/book/9780062670557">Creative Quest</a></i> by Questlove (to be published in April) and finding it a great companion (or alternative?) to <i>Big Magic</i>.<br />
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<b>What does self care look like in your life?</b><br />
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Naps! Exercise (used to be running; lately it’s Alison Egerton’s butt-kicking classes at the Maddox Y), time spent in nature, sweet treats, chill time with my family. Pausing whatever I’m working on to watch the cats chase each other around (cat stampede!) or to watch the cats sleep, or to watch the cats wash themselves, or to pet the cats. Watching cats, pretty much. Can watching cats be considered self care? That’s what self care looks like in my life. Watching cats. That, and maybe a facial once or twice a year, the occasional retail therapy splurge, and every damn day: MUSIC IN MY EARS. Often quite loud.<br />
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<b>Are there any women who helped pave the way for your success?</b><br />
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Oh, this is the best part. Nothing better than giving credit.<br />
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Above all, my mom, Susan Felts, whose creative energy and talents I can never match. She’s talented in so many ways and has a much better follow-through/completion rate on projects than I ever will. She has been my biggest supporter all my life, has encouraged all my creative explorations large and small. I’ve learned so much from her about how to be in the world, unafraid and kind and enthusiastic and curious and never stagnating, always young at heart.<br />
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Margaret Renkl, who has been a true, generous mentor. She makes me laugh with her talk and cry with her words, and she has spiffed up my writing countless times. I have sometimes lamented a lack of mentor figures in my life, but I have Margaret, and for her and her brilliant way with words I am very grateful.<br />
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Julie Shapiro, who is a fierce example of how to live a passionate, badass life in the arts while being a good friend to so many. I don’t think I have the time-management skills to be a Julie Shapiro, but I’ll always hold her up in my mind as a paragon of pursuing big goals and dreams in the arts. Many “What Would Julie Shapiro Do?” moments up in here.<br />
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Gretchen Kalwinski, who has cheered me on from afar and helped soften my hard edges and helped me become a better friend through being one of my best.<br />
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Katie McDougall, without whose optimistic tenacity and shared enthusiasm for the idea of literary community there would be no Porch. Working alongside Katie, I’ve grown in some very important ways.<br />
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Thalia Dills, not yet a woman, but you can bet she is already helping me be a better person, every day.<br />
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<b>Lastly, and most important, what is your favorite TV show and what is your favorite snack?</b><br />
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Nothing has really matched <i>The Wire</i> for me, although <i>Breaking Bad</i> came close.<br />
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Snacks: Trail mix, chocolate items of many kinds, Cheez-Its, those strange “natural” Cheetos you can get now, and salted almonds.<br />
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<i>All photos courtesy of Susannah Felts (via <a href="http://www.heidiross.com/">Heidi Ross</a>)</i><br />
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P.S. Meet my last bitch: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2018/02/an-interview-with-calligrapher-claire.html">Calligrapher, Claire White</a>!<br />
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P.P.S. Full list of My Bitches <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">here</a>.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-1676882003805885132018-02-22T13:48:00.000-06:002018-03-13T07:54:05.466-05:00Why I Will Always Cry at Coldplay<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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The second the music started, I knew it was Coldplay, and I knew I was going to cry. It was Adam Rippon's debut at the 2018 Olympic Winter Games and he was skating to "O" by Coldplay. Over the years, there have been a lot of early aughts bands I'm embarrassed to like. Coldplay is at the top of that list. My affinity for Coldplay is probably the most cliche thing about me. Oh, a woman in her forties with a passion for Chris Martin? Next!<br />
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When big things happen, you tend to remember the soundtrack of the time, or at least I do. When I turned eight, I got my first boombox. <i>Thriller</i> had just come out and I choreographed all the girls in my class to "Beat It". When I got my first car, grunge was taking America by storm and I drove all over my small town blaring "Smells Like Teen Spirit" and "Jeremy" on the CD Discman I had plugged into the tape adapter in my 1989 Chevy Cavalier. Like every girl who remembers her college years as a string of fraternity parties, "C'Mon 'N Ride It (The Train)" will always hold a special place in my Chi Omega heart. But only once has a song or a band been present for two major life events. And that band is Coldplay.</div>
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I moved to New York City in 2000. If you either don't remember, or weren't old enough to know the adult contemporary charts, Coldplay was HUGE in 2000. "Yellow" was released in 2000, and later, the full album, <i>Parachutes</i>. Every bar in New York played that album. And I mean... Every. Bar. Sweet and Vicious? <i>Parachutes</i>. Spring Street Lounge? <i>Parachutes</i>. Asylum? <i>Parachutes</i>. That bar in Williamsburg that was just couches? <i>Parachutes</i>. H&M?! <i>Parachutes</i>. Also, I was dating my first Wall Street guy and he was English. Even though he (inevitably?) turned out to be a part-time coke dealer and stole money from me, I had a hard time breaking up with him because he was my own personal Chris Martin. (It's okay, I broke up with him. But I would still sometimes give him $40 when he would show up outside of my office in his pin-striped suit and hold my hand as he walked me to the Citibank ATM.)</div>
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Moving to New York was my first great liberation. I had a family I didn't fit into anymore, a boyfriend with suicidal ideations, and a lifelong best friend who was moving to Japan. Nothing at home felt good, so I moved to New York and started over. It's a shame <i>Parachutes</i> is an album full of ballads because I had the time of my life, until I didn't.</div>
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I had been in New York ten months when 9/11 happened. I was twenty-five and had no idea how to process what I saw, or how to ask for help, so I did neither. I switched to auto-pilot and pretended I was fine. I did a pretty good job of not feeling anything until August 2002 when Coldplay released <i>A Rush of Blood to the Head</i>. It was a month before the one-year anniversary of 9/11 and the cracks in my armor were starting to show. If <i>Parachutes</i> was the soundtrack to my liberation, <i>A Rush of Blood </i><i>to the Head </i>was the soundtrack to my undoing.</div>
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On September 19, 2002, I, along with my best friend Tim, rode a train to Long Island to see Coldplay in concert at Jones Beach. It was my first time seeing them live and I cried through the whole concert. They played with the Atlantic Ocean roaring behind them and it was more than my fractured heart could handle. I was no longer carefree and riding the subway to unknown parts of Manhattan, or trying to get cute guys to buy me drinks in bars. Instead I was pretending to have fun at parties and waking up in the middle of the night paralyzed because I smelled smoke and was convinced my bedroom was on fire. But every day, I woke up, pretended I was fine, and rode the subway to work with <i>A Rush of Blood </i><i>to the Head </i>playing in my headphones.</div>
<div>
<br />
I left New York in December of 2002. Exactly two years after I moved there. Coldplay ushered me in, and Coldplay ushered me out. Today their music is a bittersweet reminder of both my potential and my trauma. It bookmarks this huge, fun thing I did in my twenties - moving to New York City, and the grief that ultimately drove me out.<br />
<br />
P.S. More on my 9/11 <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2015/07/trauma.html">trauma</a>.<br />
<br />
P.P.S. My visit to the <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2016/03/911-museum.html">National September 11 Memorial & Museum</a>.</div>
</div>
The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-90863832766081095092018-02-15T16:25:00.000-06:002018-02-15T16:25:12.254-06:00Pros and Cons of Switching to an Instagram Business Profile<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBjk-eZrQiF3K8Rancyks_XwKYIaw3Lvy7vEqzP6QN70OOWKeZ9WcDlFcD1CxdnHhtDmBXAeNzMZyrw_0yfhcmd7S0YRA7_lGxAAj6sEKcPEekE0IiQmX-cVSwD3of6FqFiuxJGDvNhu2f/s1600/File+Feb+15%252C+4+23+18+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1060" data-original-width="1600" height="263" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBjk-eZrQiF3K8Rancyks_XwKYIaw3Lvy7vEqzP6QN70OOWKeZ9WcDlFcD1CxdnHhtDmBXAeNzMZyrw_0yfhcmd7S0YRA7_lGxAAj6sEKcPEekE0IiQmX-cVSwD3of6FqFiuxJGDvNhu2f/s400/File+Feb+15%252C+4+23+18+PM.png" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
Once a month I hold open <a href="https://www.facebook.com/pg/theblondemule/videos/?ref=page_internal">Office Hours</a> on Facebook Live to answer people's quick social media questions (for FREE). This month, I talked about the pros and cons of switching to an Instagram business profile. Think of this as a companion guide to the video.<br />
<br />
Rejoice! You can schedule posts in Instagram if you're a business (and you use Hootsuite, Sprout Social, or SocialFlow). Can any business on Instagram schedule posts? No, only businesses with a business profile. What's a business profile? Should you switch to one? Glad you asked!<br />
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<b>Fun fact</b> <b>about me</b>: People pay me to help with their social media!<br />
<br />
Because of that, I switched to a business profile. I get a lot of engagement on Instagram and I wanted to open the door to some of that engagement turning into business.<br />
<br />
<b>With a business profile you get:</b><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>a contact button</li>
<li>business industry category</li>
<li>clickable business address</li>
<li>analytics</li>
<li>ability to run ads</li>
</ul>
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One very important note, you must have a Facebook business page to use an Instagram business profile.<br />
<br />
Should you make the switch? Let's look at the pros and cons.<br />
<br />
<b>Pros:</b><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>If you're a restaurant or retailer, that clickable address is a huge pro.</li>
<li>Email? You love it! Can't get enough. <i>See also</i>: don't have a website.</li>
<li>The life-changing ability to schedule posts if you manage multiple accounts, or just don't want work on nights and weekends.</li>
<li>In-app analytics that show you things like demographics on your audience, times they're active in Instagram, and reach/engagement on your posts.</li>
<li>Ability to "boost" ($$$) your posts and reach people outside of your audience.</li>
</ul>
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<b>Cons:</b><br />
<br />
There are no "real" (I'm using air quotes) cons to making the switch, but here's some food for thought.<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>A contact button? Please, you haven't answered an email since 2012.</li>
<li>You have a great website that people should visit and on that website is an FAQ that answers any question someone would email you about.</li>
<li>You don't have or want to share your physical address (raises hand).</li>
<li>You have other ways to pull your analytics.</li>
<li>Switching solely to see an increase in engagement or sales.</li>
</ul>
<br />
If you're looking to get more followers and increase engagement, switching to a business profile isn't necessarily the answer. Learn how to organically grow an audience and increase engagement by scheduling a <a href="http://www.theblondemule.com/">one-on-one consultation</a>.<br />
<br />
What do you think? Did you make the switch? What's it been like so far?<br />
<br />
Let me know in the comments!<br />
<br />
P.S. <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2018/01/5-ways-to-increase-engagement-with.html">5 Ways To Increase Engagement With Hashtags</a><br />
<br />
P.P.S. Overwhelmed? Good news, you can <a href="http://www.theblondemule.com/">hire me</a> to help.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-82624045351932508322018-02-07T14:53:00.000-06:002018-02-07T14:53:46.899-06:00An Interview with Calligrapher Claire White<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAduN3emibrjDor_xc_HDWAr2T8njG7VaqRQmkBoDrjDWsNC92DrnwfOWRXREdTSx2FxuXJMFDUz7SmuRmVMM1cvqzkqZSaiFMR37hYbILVIYcpcTzZ9hvk3BhtkvKW6tcuQpfYt0QsiJf/s1600/TMB+Claire.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1067" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAduN3emibrjDor_xc_HDWAr2T8njG7VaqRQmkBoDrjDWsNC92DrnwfOWRXREdTSx2FxuXJMFDUz7SmuRmVMM1cvqzkqZSaiFMR37hYbILVIYcpcTzZ9hvk3BhtkvKW6tcuQpfYt0QsiJf/s400/TMB+Claire.jpeg" width="266" /></a></div>
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I have a confession to make. I can't write in cursive. When I was little, I couldn't wait to learn cursive writing - it seemed so grown up! I learned it, like all good third graders, but at some point I lost it and never got it back. I remember how to make cursive letters, but I don't remember how to join them. Don't believe me? Ask to see my signature sometime.<br />
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An inept aptitude for proper penmanship is my cross to bear, which is what led me to today's bitch. Claire is a calligrapher with one of the most beautiful <a href="https://www.instagram.com/whiteinkcalligraphy/">Instagram feeds</a> I've seen. As someone who can't even sign her name, I can't imagine being so good at handwriting that people will pay you for it. And I'm not just talking wedding invitations, I'm talking hand lettered Valentines for your galentine. Meet today's bitch, Claire White!<br />
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<b>What do you do and what is the name of your business?</b><br />
<br />
Hello there! I’m Claire White, the owner of <a href="http://www.whiteinkcalligraphy.com/">White Ink Calligraphy</a>. And (drum roll), I’m a calligrapher. I’m also an attorney, but that just isn’t as fun to talk about.<br />
<br />
<b>When did you first learn about this field of work? How did you know it was what you wanted to do?</b><br />
<br />
Roughly four years ago, I took a calligraphy class from the oh-so-talented <a href="http://www.meredithcbullock.com/">Meredith Bullock</a>, to learn calligraphy for my wedding. This class was just an introduction to calligraphy, and I immediately fell in love with the art.<br />
<br />
Not a lot of my followers know this - so this is a <i>These My Bitches</i> exclusive - I hit a not so great patch in my adult life recently... aka Divorce (shoutout to the little boy who felt threatened by a strong, independent woman) - and found therapy in my calligraphy practice. Practicing was a great tool for me to be able to clear my head, focus on myself and what I was doing in the moment - which was likely a mixture of long flourish lines and figuring out how the hell to mix the perfect gold ink consistency. I took back my maiden name “White” and, essentially, it was at this time that White Ink Calligraphy hit the ground running; basically out of girl power and saying to hell with everything else. And with this said, most of my close friends were worried about me working with engaged couples during this time in my life, as a good girlfriend should worry! However, I found that working with these engaged couples through the details of their wedding was a breath of fresh air - it gave me hope and truly brought my spirits higher. (Que Andra Day’s “Rise Up” in the background).<br />
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I threw together a logo and put myself out to the world as a calligrapher. This was SO HARD for me. How could I get a “calligraphy doctorate” or what made me good enough to call myself an actual calligrapher? In the creative industry, there aren’t fine lines or boxes that have to be checked off, which I love. Just do it. Go hard. Be a boss. Everything else will fall into place.<br />
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<b>What is the best piece of business advice you’ve been given?</b><br />
<br />
Enthusiasm above everything. Be enthusiastic about your skill or product. Be enthusiastic about the process. Geek out on your trade. Enthusiasm is infectious and trumps Instagram and Facebook algorithms any day. Show your audience your nerdiness about your craft and it will pay off. It always amazes me how my social media followers tell me how much they adore my behind the scene photos or Instagram Stories of me sitting on my living room floor, wearing the same sweatshirt I wore in my last story, nerding out over handmade silk, handmade paper, deckled edges, etc. WHICH IS SO NERDY! But my enthusiasm over my work shows my followers my love for the craft - allowing my clients to share my enthusiasm and story when others ask about their piece that I did for them.<br />
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<b>Can you name the biggest lesson you’ve learned or that helped improve the way you work?</b><br />
<br />
White Ink Calligraphy is my side hustle. So time management is everything. I’m always looking for ways to streamline my emails, canned responses, invoice tracking, etc.<br />
<br />
Secondly, because I think this is so important: Comparison is truly a thief of honoring one’s success. In this super social media heavy world we all take part in, early on I found myself looking at other calligrapher’s work, wondering how my work stacked up to theirs. I quickly stopped doing that… it only drove me crazy and was a huge distraction.<br />
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<b>What would you do with 2 more hours a day?</b><br />
<br />
I mean... be a boss for 2 more hours. Right?!<br />
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<b>What has been the biggest sacrifice you’ve made?</b><br />
<br />
I’ve never considered my side hustle to include any sacrifices. The hustle keeps me happy. I’m a goal digger and genuinely get satisfaction out of setting goals and doing everything in my power to reach them; even if I fall short. If we want to talk about sacrifices - law school was a huge sacrifice (for my sanity!). I got about halfway through law school and wasn’t positive I wanted to even practice law... but, I’m not a quitter; so I pushed through, which was probably the most difficult thing I’ve ever been confronted with. Don’t be a quitter. Set goals and you will exceed your personal expectations.<br />
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<b>What is your greatest success, or something you’re most proud of related to what you do?</b><br />
<br />
I’m still a baby at this whole creative entrepreneur thing. I recently had my first publication in the Southern Bride Magazine, which was huge for me. I’ve compiled the most amazing photos of my work, thanks to my friend-ors in the wedding industry, and have put together a portfolio that shines. I’ve had the opportunity to teach a few calligraphy classes and watch my calligraphy travel the world (check out <a href="https://www.instagram.com/explore/tags/whiteinktravels/">#whiteinktravels</a> on IG).<br />
<br />
White Ink Calligraphy just hit one year. If that’s not something to celebrate, I don’t know what is.<br />
<br />
<b>Do you have a morning ritual that helps you set the tone for the day?</b><br />
<br />
Every single morning, I take a mug of coffee outside and throw the ball for my golden retriever. Rain or shine. It usually takes about 20 minutes with the “chuck-it” (this ball throwing contraption) before he is worn out. We go inside; while he is catching his breath and cooling off, tongue usually on the floor, I’m making myself breakfast.<br />
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<b>How do you decompress at night?</b><br />
<br />
Wine. Usually, always.<br />
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<b>What helps when you’re stuck? Do you have a motto or quote that inspires/motivates you?</b><br />
<br />
I tend to work best under time constraints or pressure (that’s the lawyer in me). So when I’m working for a styled shoot or some sort of thing that I know I’m on a deadline, I have no problem waiting until the last minute - because that is usually where my best work comes out. I know my capabilities and have trust in myself. “Waiting until the last minute” - It sounds awful, but it’s true - and for good reason, I suppose.<br />
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<b>What does self care look like in your life?</b><br />
<br />
My self care time is when I’m working out. I’m a huge fan of the barre method and have found a few spin instructors I’m obsessed with. Self care for me is sweating. Gross? Whatever; it helps me unwind, and being constantly reminded to relax my shoulders doesn’t hurt. I work out for my mental health just as much as I do for my physical health.<br />
<br />
<b>Are there any women who helped pave the way for your success?</b><br />
<br />
I’m a junkie for keeping up with local businesses; what’s new, changes that are made, etc. So I’d have to say that all the fab ladies in East Nashville that are doing big things are true inspirations: my barre studio owner; the owner of the local boutiques that I shop at, the business that is the one woman show in the wedding industry - all are truly inspiring.<br />
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<br />
<b>Lastly, and most important, what is your favorite TV show and what is your favorite snack?</b><br />
<br />
I’m about to show you how basic I can be: <i>Game of Thrones</i> and boom-chicka-pop popcorn.<br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>All photos courtesy of Claire White</i><br />
<br />
P.S. Meet my last bitch: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2018/01/an-interview-with-online-media-manager.html">Online Media Manager, Charlotte Weatherington</a>!<br />
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P.P.S. Full list of My Bitches <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">here</a>.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-66554955807082708422018-02-01T10:09:00.001-06:002018-02-01T10:09:48.701-06:00Self-Care and Saying No<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglypBwo1SnfrVGRBOvJUuoSKVkVLf_zUakuvzBNWxWDN73oGSbzypI8NPtqgk4iJ97jI2x81_jCCzfoAMTqx0bRUx2bQ1UTxf__883fwT4a2-h0731UA4qwIE6-AF6Ibff_h-f4bxEUUXR/s1600/No.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglypBwo1SnfrVGRBOvJUuoSKVkVLf_zUakuvzBNWxWDN73oGSbzypI8NPtqgk4iJ97jI2x81_jCCzfoAMTqx0bRUx2bQ1UTxf__883fwT4a2-h0731UA4qwIE6-AF6Ibff_h-f4bxEUUXR/s400/No.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>
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I should really change my blog to <i>Thoughts From A Recovering Perfectionist</i>. Back in the fall, there was a week where I broke my brain by doing too much. Partly because I said yes to a lot of things I didn't realize would happen in the same week. And partly because I'm a people pleaser, and guess what people pleasers do? They say yes.<br />
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I did three events that week that should have been a month apart. And one of them was my <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/12/the-blonde-mule-is-10.html">blog party</a>, which I had been imagining and planning for years. Unfortunately, my party was the last thing scheduled that week and by the time it rolled around, I was exhausted. I had a panic attack a few hours before my party because I was tired and my house wasn't clean. The party ended up being fine. No one noticed my bathrooms weren't clean, or that I was a tiny bit disassociated, but I woke up the next morning with a red, hot, swollen, itchy rash on my spine.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwjjhe9ypM4LKAwm_Eik717dQmMtB3-pVhT5ezv0Dx0aLVxqJlJcO0GK1M1jhCVIIhpYhizkdeKFqo-BOtlo2k7UWT3snN4eDH258R9WLT52PMmeRVcUREmvU9KP47T4zGpksRt9Z5fQEw/s1600/spine+rash.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="693" data-original-width="750" height="368" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwjjhe9ypM4LKAwm_Eik717dQmMtB3-pVhT5ezv0Dx0aLVxqJlJcO0GK1M1jhCVIIhpYhizkdeKFqo-BOtlo2k7UWT3snN4eDH258R9WLT52PMmeRVcUREmvU9KP47T4zGpksRt9Z5fQEw/s400/spine+rash.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>
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Here's the thing, everything I said yes to that week, I wanted to do, but, turns out, it was more than I could handle, thus, spine rash. It's not like I'm constantly saying yes to things I don't want to do. It's that, and here's where the recovering perfectionist comes in, I don't know my limits, or rather, I don't respect my limits. I also have to keep in check my attraction to adrenaline and excitement. It's one of my favorite hiding places, <i>see also: </i>Ironman 70.3 Augusta.<br />
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Here's what I learned. I can't prioritize what I'm holding if I'm holding more than I can carry (I know, read that again). Here's a fun exercise. Pick up eight small items around your house and hold them in your hands - all of them. Now, without dropping them or setting them down, arrange them in order of importance. You can't. And neither can I.<br />
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For two weeks, I went HAM on self-care. I said no to everything. I thought, this will be easy, no one ever asks me for anything. Lolololol. In the first 24 hours, four people asked me to do things for them (*for free). I was like, ohhhhhh, now I see. Me the individual came first. If I had to drop something I consider self-care: yoga, meditation, exercise, the answer was no. Sound fun? It wasn't.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">*You guys, you have to pay me to 'pick my brain'. You might be surprised to learn this, but lattes don't pay my mortgage, or more importantly, buy my dog's dementia medicine. Shout-out, Linda!</span><br />
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When the two weeks were over, I started saying yes again, but only after waiting 24 hours to respond (this is a new rule that I am very much enjoying). Around this time, I heard Oprah on <i>Dear Sugar</i> and Shonda Rhimes on <i>Super Soul Conversations</i>. They were both talking about how saying no is saying yes to yourself. Oprah said she keeps a list of times it felt good to say yes. When someone asks her to do something, she looks at that list and remembers how it felt in her body to say yes to something she wanted to do.<br />
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Because I do everything Oprah says, I made my own lists. I made one like hers, times it felt good to say yes, and a second list of times my instinct said no and my mouth said yes. Everything on the second list ended in disaster - broken contracts, unpaid invoices, unreturned emails, lost friendships - you know, fun stuff.<br />
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I'm saying no more often. I have a piece of paper with examples of how to say no taped above my desk. I still get excited and forget to wait 24 hours before responding, but I'm getting better. This is going to seem contradictory, but if you haven't read <i><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Year-Yes-Dance-Stand-Person/dp/1476777128/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1517346070&sr=8-1">Year of Yes</a></i> by Shonda Rhimes, read it. And listen to those podcasts. Hashtag: Oprah2020. Hashtag: j/k. Hashtag: I'm kidding! Don't blow up my mentions.<br />
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Okay, here are the podcasts:<br />
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Dear Sugar: <a href="http://www.wbur.org/dearsugar/2017/07/15/dear-sugars-oprah">The Power Of No, Part 1 - Oprah Winfrey</a></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Oprah's Super Soul Conversations: <a href="https://player.fm/series/oprahs-supersoul-conversations-1708688/shonda-rhimes-change-your-life-by-saying-yes-and-no-too">Changing Your Life By Saying Yes - Shonda Rhimes</a></blockquote>
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P.S. I wrote about <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2016/11/4-ways-to-practice-self-care.html">self-care after the election</a> and it's sadly still relevant.<br />
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P.P.S. Have I ever regretted being vulnerable online? <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/08/being-vulnerable-online.html">Not really</a>.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-85638042743341752542018-01-24T16:46:00.000-06:002018-01-24T16:46:41.431-06:002017 Reading Round Up, Part Four<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPeoG35FgaCczsP0KUu-v6kV4aLiF7hw1qIlYrvDCTSbe5QNjpNs4IPn_Z-p5p-6rfowanY8y6tJhpICY30WYkN1yeJKB48HykGS1z4dL-M5_Yn0ZUhVXYj54_9homfeeX_dDO14qO6q_1/s1600/File+Apr+13%252C+2+07+57+PM.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPeoG35FgaCczsP0KUu-v6kV4aLiF7hw1qIlYrvDCTSbe5QNjpNs4IPn_Z-p5p-6rfowanY8y6tJhpICY30WYkN1yeJKB48HykGS1z4dL-M5_Yn0ZUhVXYj54_9homfeeX_dDO14qO6q_1/s400/File+Apr+13%252C+2+07+57+PM.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>
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As a reminder, these are off-the-cuff reviews that I peck into my phone as soon as I finish the book. A literary critic, I am not.<br />
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Here's what I've been reading!<br />
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/33413904-the-best-american-essays-2017" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="The Best American Essays 2017" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1487314506m/33413904.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/33413904-the-best-american-essays-2017">The Best American Essays 2017</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/3105772.Leslie_Jamison">Leslie Jamison</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2223923161">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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So glad I read this. Blown away by this collection of personal essays. There are more than a few that I can’t stop thinking about.<br />
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/20523637-double-exposure" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Double Exposure (From Every Angle, #1)" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1398188033m/20523637.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/20523637-double-exposure">Double Exposure</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/7941.Erin_McCarthy">Erin McCarthy</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2259481850">2 of 5 stars</a><br />
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I mean, I’ve definitely read worse books. I give it two eggplant emojis! (My friend <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/01/an-interview-with-artist-louisa-glenn.html">Louisa</a> and I bought these as a joke and then Instagram-Storied our way through reading them, which you can watch <a href="https://www.instagram.com/gracelouisagee/">here</a>. #BookReport)<br />
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/28813966-cooking-for-jeffrey" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Cooking for Jeffrey: A Barefoot Contessa Cookbook" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1482257305m/28813966.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/28813966-cooking-for-jeffrey">Cooking for Jeffrey: A Barefoot Contessa Cookbook</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/2658.Ina_Garten">Ina Garten</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2225653140">3 of 5 stars</a><br />
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I’m sure it’s intended to be heartfelt, but it struck me as outdated and meant for a very specific audience. Some of the ingredients and instructions seem above my skill level, but there are a few recipes I’d like to try. It’s just so bizarre that she wrote a cookbook about cooking for her husband.<br />
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/34129998-smitten-kitchen-every-day" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Smitten Kitchen Every Day: Triumphant and Unfussy New Favorites" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1495034106m/34129998.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/34129998-smitten-kitchen-every-day">Smitten Kitchen Every Day: Triumphant and Unfussy New Favorites</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/5416055.Deb_Perelman">Deb Perelman</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2200216875">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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New favorite cookbook, hands-down. I read it cover to cover and bookmarked so many recipes. I love Deb’s writing style and I can’t wait to start trying out these recipes.<br />
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/34525525-what-unites-us" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="What Unites Us: Reflections on Patriotism" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1499343630m/34525525.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/34525525-what-unites-us">What Unites Us: Reflections on Patriotism</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/202937.Dan_Rather">Dan Rather</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2212616328">2 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Meh. It’s fine. I could have lived my life without this book, but it didn’t hurt. If you love his FB posts, you’ll probably love this book. If you find yourself exhausted from this specific perspective, leave it on the shelf.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/31247028-jack-s-wife-freda" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Jack's Wife Freda: Cooking from New York's West Village" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1485922357m/31247028.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/31247028-jack-s-wife-freda">Jack's Wife Freda: Cooking from New York's West Village</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/15524290.Maya_Jankelowitz">Maya Jankelowitz</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2225654038">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Really sweet book. I eat at Jack’s Wife Freda every time I’m in NYC. I’ll probably never make any of these recipes, but the book is worth it for the introduction and the pictures. If you love the restaurant, you’ll love the book.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6340016-lit" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Lit" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1439526383m/6340016.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6340016-lit">Lit</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/8865.Mary_Karr">Mary Karr</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1510967330">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Slow start, strong finish. I’ve been reading this off and on all year. Putting it down every time a new book caught my eye. It didn’t hook me initially, but once I sat down and committed to reading it, I was blown away. I loved her perspective on sobriety, recovery, and prayer. Moving and beautiful.<br />
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/34114362-what-happened" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="What Happened" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1501171573m/34114362.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/34114362-what-happened">What Happened</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/2778471.Hillary_Rodham_Clinton">Hillary Rodham Clinton</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2124555770">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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This book is everything I wanted it to be. I cried a lot while reading it, but I feel more peace and hope than I’ve felt since the election. It gets a little tedious in the middle, but stick with it. The ending is worth it.<br />
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/34466922-sleeping-beauties" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Sleeping Beauties" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1510335748m/34466922.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/34466922-sleeping-beauties">Sleeping Beauties</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/3389.Stephen_King">Stephen King</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2116967425">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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This book is for readers familiar with Stephen King’s high page count and slow start. All the action is at the end. I didn’t find the book “scary”, but I did find it fascinating. It’s probably scarier to male readers. I really enjoyed it. If you’re on the fence, read it. Just know that it won’t get going until around 150-200 pages. It’s worth it.<br />
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/13330544-the-things-that-matter" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="The Things That Matter" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1350000395m/13330544.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/13330544-the-things-that-matter">The Things That Matter</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/322550.Nate_Berkus">Nate Berkus</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2169397470">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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I loved this book and am going online right now to buy it (I read a library copy). This book is where Nate tells his story of surviving the tsunami and losing his partner, Fernando, what happened, how he grieved, and how he moved on. It is also a huge design book filled with pictures of homes he designed, or friends’ homes that he thinks you should see. It’s a really great book.<br />
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P.S. Forgot what I read in the third part of 2017? <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/11/2017-reading-round-up-part-three.html">Here</a> you go!<br />
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P.P.S. Are we <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/kimbaldwin76">friends on Goodreads</a>?The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-5290619542083499382018-01-17T15:37:00.002-06:002018-01-17T15:37:32.558-06:005 Ways To Increase Engagement With Hashtags<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMT2ErXnw2N5cEfipVbRja3vm4mI2_OsRQxfGIM_rr64DmdFr5Hxwi0hFLfVeeqWMZXnmvusFAODYwoW01tBXI01JDw1U3xXVb1_BT_hOD-WIZhF7lTzCpw16Z6Hn7lRYTSuI6fUAms0x1/s1600/Hashtags.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1060" data-original-width="1600" height="263" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMT2ErXnw2N5cEfipVbRja3vm4mI2_OsRQxfGIM_rr64DmdFr5Hxwi0hFLfVeeqWMZXnmvusFAODYwoW01tBXI01JDw1U3xXVb1_BT_hOD-WIZhF7lTzCpw16Z6Hn7lRYTSuI6fUAms0x1/s400/Hashtags.png" width="400" /></a></div>
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Being a business or brand (or blog) online is a constant struggle between trying to get more followers and trying not to embarrass yourself while getting more followers. Should you use hashtags? Should you follow everyone back who follows you? Should you pay for one of those services that guarantees followers?<br />
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The one thing I get asked about the most from every client, in every pitch, and from all of my friends is hashtags. I even started holding open <a href="https://www.facebook.com/pg/theblondemule/videos/?ref=page_internal">Office Hours</a> so you could ask me questions live and get answers in real time. So without further ado....<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Here are 5 ways to increase engagement with hashtags!</b><br />
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1) Search for hashtags that describe your product/brand and the people you're trying to reach. Look for hashtags that are relevant, but less widely used, i.e. with 5k-100k uses instead of 1-2 million, that way your post will rise to the top in the section. Hashtags with over a million uses are getting updated every second and your post will get lost in the fray.<br />
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2) Use your own name and/or brand as a hashtag. A good hashtag does two things: covers your overall brand, and is specific to your post.<br />
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3) Create a community hashtag for your product/brand. Make sure and include the hashtag in your bio: "Show us how you use our product with #____". Then you can repost pics showing people using your products. A good example of this is, #igotitatgoodwill.<br />
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4) Use between 11-30 hashtags on a post to do well in the Instagram algorithm (30 is the max allowed). It's personal preference whether you include them in the post or as a comment.<br />
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5) Find brands like yours with a strong hashtag game and copy theirs!<br />
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<b>Tips and tricks!</b><br />
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Use predictive text on your phone for the hashtags you use the most so you don't have to copy and paste every time. Open Settings, go to General, Keyboard, then Text Replacement. Click on the + in the upper right corner to add your phrase. The phrase is the list of hashtags you want to fill in. The shortcut is what will automatically expand into the word or phrase as you type, i.e. blog, business, etc.<br />
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Look for trending hashtags, but again, beware of hashtags with 1 million + uses. Hilariously, a few months ago, #september was trending, but unbeknownst to everyone using it, they were all shadow banned because the tag got so overused. [insert scream face emoji]<br />
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Every 30, 60, or 90 days, do a search of the hashtags you're using and make sure they're still relevant to your posts/brand.<br />
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<b>Please for the love of god tell me what a shadow ban is!</b><br />
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Shadow bans happen on hashtags with over a million uses. It's because spammers use the trending hashtags and clutter the feed with content that goes against Instagram's Terms Of Use. So everyone under the hashtag gets a temporary "shadowban" while Instagram investigates and decides which posts get to stay. To avoid this, use a mix of hashtags with different sizes (5k-100k) and beware of hashtags with sexual connotations. As all of my friends in the burlesque community can attest, Instagram is a prude!<br />
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P.S. How do I know all of this? Because it's <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2015/10/social-media-day-in-life.html">my job</a>!<br />
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P.P.S. Overwhelmed? Good news, you can <a href="http://www.theblondemule.com/">hire me</a>.<br />
<br />The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-85987126298938106002018-01-10T13:49:00.000-06:002018-01-10T13:49:43.289-06:00An Interview with Online Media Manager Charlotte Weatherington<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdQ7CJkpdauWwGwYZzLQMwHGE3XLSELZvIb_lAzpq1G3cwq6nbUWYBZtEk6KUqtTB32fy9ES0pypOenX6WID0otkJtu7MMN981YYY65iyJ748iq0N5ETWyODiDTzqMF5_Pyr-szgesRISo/s1600/TMB+Charlotte.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="1280" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdQ7CJkpdauWwGwYZzLQMwHGE3XLSELZvIb_lAzpq1G3cwq6nbUWYBZtEk6KUqtTB32fy9ES0pypOenX6WID0otkJtu7MMN981YYY65iyJ748iq0N5ETWyODiDTzqMF5_Pyr-szgesRISo/s400/TMB+Charlotte.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>
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A bond forms when two people start something new at the same time. And that's what happened with today's Bitch. Like many of my friends, Goodwill brought Charlotte and I together. Around the time I was beginning to blog for them and cohost their shopping events, Charlotte was coming onboard as their new online media manager. We met at an event and became fast friends. We took our friendship to the next level when we decided to try FB Live for the first time, and not because we were good at it, actually, the opposite. We shot the whole video sideways. Live. On Goodwill's Facebook page. *shrug emoji<br />
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How many people do you know who do a version of your job, ten, twenty, a million? I know two, and Charlotte is one of them. I don't know that we've ever talked about social media, we mostly talk about tripods (because we both keep buying the wrong ones) and how I keep seeing versions of her cat in feminist t-shirt ads (#feministcat), but I take great comfort in knowing that if I have a question about social media, there's a new person on my advisory council. Meet my friend, Gizmo's mom, Charlotte Weatherington!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlQPyVY-NDLC__sgvCROstb27GqSZ644j0RpYMOWQMf_HPyo8W-4VxAfVGVGUHzV4s2AmEvcsYkdr3Z2DsmX9gVzAaqiXsMXHlWThc1jFkjnT3t7G_CLk_e9B9mVrX2ZniiRU22SOYg6_v/s1600/IMG_1186.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="960" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlQPyVY-NDLC__sgvCROstb27GqSZ644j0RpYMOWQMf_HPyo8W-4VxAfVGVGUHzV4s2AmEvcsYkdr3Z2DsmX9gVzAaqiXsMXHlWThc1jFkjnT3t7G_CLk_e9B9mVrX2ZniiRU22SOYg6_v/s400/IMG_1186.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<b>What is your job title and where do you work?</b><br />
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I am the Online Media Manager for <a href="http://giveit2goodwill.org/">Goodwill Industries of Middle Tennessee</a>.<br />
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<b>When did you first learn about this field of work? How did you know it was what you wanted to do?</b><br />
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I was pegged pretty early on as a strong writer, and it was something I enjoyed. So, as I began exploring career fields, I knew I wanted to pursue an occupation that had a pretty heavy writing element to it. Eventually, I found public relations, and I fell in love. In my eyes, it’s the perfect blend of writing, communication and strategy.<br />
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<b>What is the best piece of business advice you’ve been given?</b><br />
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If you can write, you can do anything.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIvZayxd71SXe_Lz-5Rko38pLNCKOBS_e0NB_hdLajPSfmnBQNNKZCNPJHgyPS_Mskt4NyDyiTPVxhQ9lA1gY-nKkAo-EmyUUVMZd-qTXXkZwcW-Dv_qo8O6BATqQXKjnMTA_8mmvh7sjw/s1600/IMG_1786.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="960" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIvZayxd71SXe_Lz-5Rko38pLNCKOBS_e0NB_hdLajPSfmnBQNNKZCNPJHgyPS_Mskt4NyDyiTPVxhQ9lA1gY-nKkAo-EmyUUVMZd-qTXXkZwcW-Dv_qo8O6BATqQXKjnMTA_8mmvh7sjw/s400/IMG_1786.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<b>Can you name the biggest lesson you’ve learned or that helped improve the way you work?</b><br />
<br />
For better or for worse, in general, most people are fairly forgetful. So that means two things: 1). Don’t beat yourself up over something you said or did that, in hindsight, you felt was out of character, embarrassing or even mildly offensive. There’s a good chance that whoever was present will forget about it, or is too wrapped up in something weird they said or did to care about your little hiccup. Learn from your mistake and move on. And, 2). Don’t be afraid to speak up or remind a coworker if you feel like a deliverable you’ve asked for has fallen by the wayside. Particularly as women, I think we’re conditioned by society to be hypersensitive to coming across as “nagging” or “belligerent.” Don’t overthink it. Just ask.<br />
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<b>What would you do with two more hours a day?</b><br />
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While it was challenging, I found my time spent pursuing a master’s degree to be very rewarding. If money wasn’t an issue, I think it would be fascinating to use that extra time to pursue a doctorate degree in public relations.<br />
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<b>What is your greatest success, or something you’re most proud of related to what you do?</b><br />
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I’m proud of myself for pursuing the Online Media Manager position with Goodwill. I enjoyed the agency I worked with previously very much - I was comfortable in my work, writing, pitching to media, branding, etc. The people were some of the best in the business, and I had what I felt were some major wins while I was there. But, when the position with Goodwill became available, something just seemed right. It was out of my comfort zone, for sure — digital marketing requires a particular strain of ingenuity, and it’s a medium where less words is more — but taking into consideration the direction marketing and public relations is taking in favor of digital and online media and the chance to work with a brand like Goodwill, the opportunity was too good to pass by. Working for a nonprofit comes with its own unique set of challenges, but, thankfully, I work with a fantastic team of people who all believe in not only me, but also our mission of changing lives through education, training and employment. That can make all the difference some days!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwEjSuhns4FFQ2_ILTHLS6QzlDDLy_iA62tc50IkBKYQkpbvSfxvzZ55iOry97YAWAfuQbbWBsmF9xrAV_MbITn7FRyzXkRiNqTfbquHXZkLsCI3f12kvpUPV4hGrj59jLoxUhsIMBvJ1t/s1600/IMG_2018.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="960" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwEjSuhns4FFQ2_ILTHLS6QzlDDLy_iA62tc50IkBKYQkpbvSfxvzZ55iOry97YAWAfuQbbWBsmF9xrAV_MbITn7FRyzXkRiNqTfbquHXZkLsCI3f12kvpUPV4hGrj59jLoxUhsIMBvJ1t/s400/IMG_2018.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b>How do you decompress at the end of the work day?</b><br />
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I soak in the time I have to spend with my husband Casey and follow our kitty Gizmo (#feministcat) around. If I feel the need to go out after work, I enjoy treasure hunting at Goodwill or another one of my favorite stores around our neighborhood.<br />
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<b>What’s a fear that keeps you up at night?</b><br />
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It doesn’t necessarily keep me up at night, but sometimes I worry that I’m not writing enough and/or that I’ll become stagnant in my work and skillset. But then I remind myself that if I want to write more, I just have to do it. And, working for a nonprofit like Goodwill is so dynamic with countless opportunities to grow and learn from the industry and the people I work with. The only surefire way for me to become stagnant would be for me to begin to believe my fears and become blind to the opportunities I already have access to.<br />
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<b>What is one thing everyone gets wrong about what you do?</b><br />
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Sometimes, people refer to me as a social media manager. While that’s understandable, and social media is a very important aspect of my job, my responsibilities encapsulate so much more than that, including using strategic methods to boost Goodwill’s SEO rankings, responding to online reviews and providing my professional input for PR and marketing campaigns.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfcvC1Vx3mLL0z3HJ8lqy5QLlEZIdwqu-Q4Z_Ba9WUhJ3akOPeJUB2QdedFEp5_mxvecYgqopGLjdgskh69gAsswtHlMUrfr9XWyBQPvkJl9619HXebmW0QbIoH9X52Ed0KEnxK9muKCVu/s1600/IMG_2525.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="960" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfcvC1Vx3mLL0z3HJ8lqy5QLlEZIdwqu-Q4Z_Ba9WUhJ3akOPeJUB2QdedFEp5_mxvecYgqopGLjdgskh69gAsswtHlMUrfr9XWyBQPvkJl9619HXebmW0QbIoH9X52Ed0KEnxK9muKCVu/s400/IMG_2525.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<br />
<b>What does self care look like in your life?</b><br />
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Talking with Casey, playing with Gizmo, eating vegan food, reading, shopping. Social media gets a bad rap, but I think even it can be a form of self care in moderation if you see it as a way to enjoy the creativity and positivity of others rather than trying to use it for comparison.<br />
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<b>What helps when you’re stuck? Do you have a motto or quote that inspires/motivates you?</b><br />
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I just remember that you win some and you lose some. Acknowledge your wins with moderation, but don’t beat yourself up over the missed opportunities. Everything balances out in the end, I think.<br />
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<b>Are there any women who helped pave the way for your success?</b><br />
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First and foremost, my mom! She homeschooled me and my sisters through middle and high school and has always helped me think outside the box and shoot for the moon when looking for career development and job opportunities. Otherwise, my bosses — who were women — at the agency were influential in my development. The standard they held me to and the time they invested in me to grow as a young professional is invaluable and will stay with me for a long time.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8SRG3m7FEYnLSYGJS9VJRfvu6xsLpJ_GC-I2COdqqlZyGSXi45Ow-dA_50n9rBw0dkR_1mZuZxE5IGuwjgpudkAnpG6Zq2jl4CbjrbQ_MTppNURHJiLiV7TO4IhhP-BEXZ10KLlhifd9X/s1600/IMG_1709.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1280" data-original-width="960" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8SRG3m7FEYnLSYGJS9VJRfvu6xsLpJ_GC-I2COdqqlZyGSXi45Ow-dA_50n9rBw0dkR_1mZuZxE5IGuwjgpudkAnpG6Zq2jl4CbjrbQ_MTppNURHJiLiV7TO4IhhP-BEXZ10KLlhifd9X/s400/IMG_1709.jpeg" width="300" /></a></div>
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<b>Lastly, and most important, what is your favorite TV show and what is your favorite snack?</b><br />
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I think <i>Parks and Recreation</i> was probably the most impactful TV show for me, with <i>The Office</i> as a close second. And, I could eat Chex cereal all day every day.<br />
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<i>All photos courtesy of Charlotte Weatherington</i><br />
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P.S. Meet last week's bitch: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/12/an-interview-with-certified-iyengar.html">Certified Iyengar Yoga Teacher, Rachel Mathenia</a>!<br />
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P.P.S. Full list of My Bitches <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">here</a>.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-55436520759208946082017-12-21T07:17:00.000-06:002017-12-21T07:17:57.856-06:00These My Bitches: 2017 Year In Review<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiL9qtNrs5P3I3PfMI_S9FLXsABxhyphenhyphenKhFVfSTuhgDBy0nc_082J_0Tl_oSIx00qzenYt04BfnhHWtAZRYwxePM8Rp2r-k5uTG0J8iUnqzkY-pNkvxtjEMJRGkoO-JwEtzhWj2mQIFvGfDl5/s1600/IMG_2381.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiL9qtNrs5P3I3PfMI_S9FLXsABxhyphenhyphenKhFVfSTuhgDBy0nc_082J_0Tl_oSIx00qzenYt04BfnhHWtAZRYwxePM8Rp2r-k5uTG0J8iUnqzkY-pNkvxtjEMJRGkoO-JwEtzhWj2mQIFvGfDl5/s400/IMG_2381.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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I can't believe this series is two years old! My first Bitch, <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2015/11/an-interview-with-artist-manager-marne.html">Marne McLyman</a> was published on November 16, 2015. Wow, times flies when you're making all your friends fill out online questionnaires. Thanks, Bitches!<br />
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<b>Here are the top ten viewed Bitches of 2017!</b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnAgVC9MaBwpPKma8gbEXMy4LbPn1a_v79_JW5N1lqsLGiR6p8zgMYaim6pm09qMU4glOSRcI3VdaZrYb0hIGixNgc1271HOxiivlbNRNVNQC7zIEUKwcLNUBpiXc0c0onS4xQfGYDhVBQ/s1600/TMB+Brittney.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnAgVC9MaBwpPKma8gbEXMy4LbPn1a_v79_JW5N1lqsLGiR6p8zgMYaim6pm09qMU4glOSRcI3VdaZrYb0hIGixNgc1271HOxiivlbNRNVNQC7zIEUKwcLNUBpiXc0c0onS4xQfGYDhVBQ/s400/TMB+Brittney.jpeg" width="398" /></a></div>
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3109 views -- Brittney Forrister: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/05/an-interview-with-ebth-sales-specialist.html">EBTH Sales Specialist</a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTNLEyQ9bxXHDEx9ugaawyUyjGHMbK-q4q3l2j-n9z-sBhJTnQ3znMmOMTues4lHiHCL1jQ495fyBm4KDO5apVO8dwAu1EZW8SKDE3c4WngjYgHQXoMPgrwkRAwKzjq4AU9HDCyWTI-KZf/s1600/TMB+Niketa.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTNLEyQ9bxXHDEx9ugaawyUyjGHMbK-q4q3l2j-n9z-sBhJTnQ3znMmOMTues4lHiHCL1jQ495fyBm4KDO5apVO8dwAu1EZW8SKDE3c4WngjYgHQXoMPgrwkRAwKzjq4AU9HDCyWTI-KZf/s400/TMB+Niketa.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>
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2068 views -- Niketa Hailey-Hill: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/10/an-interview-with-goodwill-marketing.html">Goodwill Marketing Manager</a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1wYuitgINov23nsCW4fPtr2hgdb7TfPxqRXmZPFRDz0ucFZUUMS4VjZoi9ChPeUAT2bUaki81n6WmLvIKJ6MVBuTYX90pECeNMWtyJQgDldQ5mBejvinmai6_kt_KG7pWJvL3G5GzL_Rp/s1600/File+Feb+27%252C+11+11+33+AM.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1wYuitgINov23nsCW4fPtr2hgdb7TfPxqRXmZPFRDz0ucFZUUMS4VjZoi9ChPeUAT2bUaki81n6WmLvIKJ6MVBuTYX90pECeNMWtyJQgDldQ5mBejvinmai6_kt_KG7pWJvL3G5GzL_Rp/s400/File+Feb+27%252C+11+11+33+AM.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>
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1789 views -- Jessica Maloan: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/02/an-interview-with-shop-owner-jessica.html">Shop Owner</a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlYeO1rCRaCIgi6X1XtILapAIUbRgwDoEwyLbpoLghku5IuwYzha3LhE3PuV27JmLq-RfxKmh_3g8tTXsjbN4hJEX43hHrfG1Giaq_jcmtmUM-SfX8U4Tss0jEI1R0QgqhzXJu85tUvMGz/s1600/TMB+Tisha+final.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="300" data-original-width="400" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlYeO1rCRaCIgi6X1XtILapAIUbRgwDoEwyLbpoLghku5IuwYzha3LhE3PuV27JmLq-RfxKmh_3g8tTXsjbN4hJEX43hHrfG1Giaq_jcmtmUM-SfX8U4Tss0jEI1R0QgqhzXJu85tUvMGz/s400/TMB+Tisha+final.png" width="400" /></a></div>
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1493 views -- Katherine Tisha Wilson: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2016/10/an-interview-with-bfabfitness.html">Fitness Instructor</a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgshyphenhyphenUgyg_eAlwni9CCu6y82pZUFaU-czc1CNXvDMNUH0SQlordqwP6I_dSjpjjwoC62PUeswU5ui-5NMp6_4rsDx20xOOoKdr9JpNLl46hZlK71QSD8YgtshFAvYu2f4DCDWdKJ5X_PREG/s1600/File+Oct+16%252C+11+41+29+AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1201" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgshyphenhyphenUgyg_eAlwni9CCu6y82pZUFaU-czc1CNXvDMNUH0SQlordqwP6I_dSjpjjwoC62PUeswU5ui-5NMp6_4rsDx20xOOoKdr9JpNLl46hZlK71QSD8YgtshFAvYu2f4DCDWdKJ5X_PREG/s400/File+Oct+16%252C+11+41+29+AM.png" width="300" /></a></div>
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1361 views -- Betsey Appleton: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/10/an-interview-with-attorney-and-fashion.html">Attorney and Fashion Blogger</a><br />
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1315 views -- Rachel Mathenia: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/12/an-interview-with-certified-iyengar.html">Certified Iyengar Yoga Teacher</a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgC3vbfZubbWLttdWcPI35XZOkql4PejQgc67ouym4OXqqhaOpv4AnLeET6FFAlh9zA06PdL7BJRpuC-3J6ZLw7bqk7zyitHfAxd_6ePgAXCC321nGQtqg5l6a2kdKZp07acfqF3PvYuHBb/s1600/File+Jul+10%252C+8+18+03+AM.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1140" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgC3vbfZubbWLttdWcPI35XZOkql4PejQgc67ouym4OXqqhaOpv4AnLeET6FFAlh9zA06PdL7BJRpuC-3J6ZLw7bqk7zyitHfAxd_6ePgAXCC321nGQtqg5l6a2kdKZp07acfqF3PvYuHBb/s400/File+Jul+10%252C+8+18+03+AM.jpeg" width="283" /></a></div>
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1296 views -- Alicia Hunker: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2016/07/an-interview-with-charter-school.html">Charter School Teacher</a><br />
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1200 views -- Courtney C. Stevens: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/03/an-interview-with-author-courtney-c.html">Author</a><br />
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1189 views -- Shannon Miller: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2016/12/an-interview-with-stay-at-home-mom.html">Stay-At-Home Mom</a><br />
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1185 views -- Melanie Bull: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2016/05/an-interview-with-public-policy.html">Public Policy Director</a><br />
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<b>Tips and Tricks</b><br />
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So what makes a Bitch break the internet? It's simple, Facebook. That's okay, I groaned, too. But you guys, Facebook is where 80% (approx. I can't do the math) of my traffic comes from. If you're active on Facebook, your post will perform well. What does "active on Facebook" mean? It means allowing the post on your timeline, sharing the post, liking and commenting on the post, and if you have a Page that's tagged in the post, doing all of that again as your Page. I'm continually astounded at how many people with Pages don't check their notifications, or "like" the posts they're tagged in. An Instagram shout-out is nice, but I get legit zero traffic from Instagram (or Twitter, FWIW). Google is my top referring site. Facebook mobile is second and Facebook desktop is third. Instagram is 8th, and Twitter isn't even on the list, although, inexplicably, vampire stats dot com is (shrug emoji). Shout-out to the 494 vampires who read my blog! Get at me, Lestat.<br />
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<b>New in 2018!</b><br />
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No major changes. I'm going to slow my roll a little bit and adjust the posting schedule. One post a week that publishes on Monday morning breaks my brain, so I'm not doing it anymore. I'm going to change from four Bitches a month to one or two, and publish mid-week, instead of Monday morning.<br />
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A lot of my Bitches are makers, business owners, non-profit directors, etc. - women you can buy things from, support, and give money to. I'm going to make more of an effort to spotlight these Bitches year round. Maybe we can work out a cross-promotion, discount, or giveaway. Stay tuned.<br />
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<b>Nominations</b><br />
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I'm still gleefully accepting nominations, so keep them coming! Remember, if you nominate someone, you're responsible for writing their intro.<br />
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See you in 2018!<br />
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P.S. Find out which four Bitches have been in the Top Ten <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2016/12/these-my-bitches-year-in-review.html">two years running</a>!<br />
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P.P.S. Meet all 82 (!!) of my Bitches <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">here</a>.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-87882109768562137232017-12-13T15:25:00.000-06:002017-12-13T15:25:17.446-06:00The Blonde Mule is 10!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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A couple of big things happened recently. *Janie Crawford turned 29, and my blog - this blog - turned 10! I wrote my <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2007/12/dear-blog.html">first blog post</a> on December 4, 2007. A whopping 82 people read it and it received 1 comment from my very good <strike>friend</strike> bitch, <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2016/01/an-interview-with-real-estate.html">Natalie</a>, aka Shawtime. I've written 1310 blog posts, roughly 131 posts a year (11 posts a month) for TEN YEARS!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">*The Paperless Post I sent for my blog party didn't autofill correctly, and instead invited everyone to Janie Crawford's 29th birthday at Herb's Jazz Club.</span><br />
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Let me paint a picture of 2007. MySpace had just died (RIP Top 8), Facebook and Twitter were a year old, not widely used, and Instagram didn't exist. What a time to be alive! All these really cool women had really cool blogs, and you could leave comments and they'd respond. Blogging enabled a lot of women to have a voice on the internet - and go on to write books, start companies, etc. What you now put on Facebook, in 2007, you put into a 4-paragraph blog post. Instagram? Please. No one knew how to take pictures in 2007. There weren't smart phones! There were no filters or ways to edit the brightness. What, was I going to buy editing software and learn how to edit my pictures? Hell no. Those dark ass pictures went straight to my blog.<br />
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In 2007, I was 31 years old, working as a staffer in the state senate, dating John, living in a garage, getting my cardio from a step aerobics class at the Green Hills Y (shout-out, Marcus!), and preaching the gospel of Weight Watchers. It was a simpler time. So what was I blogging about? Who knows! I'm too embarrassed to go back and read my old posts. J/K. I've read them and they are hilariously awful. On brand, but awful.<br />
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Here are my most viewed posts of all time!<br />
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8018 views - <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2010/07/warby-parker-glasses.html">Warby Parker Glasses</a><br />
4337 views - <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-i-met-dan-auerbach.html">The Day I Met Dan Auerbach</a><br />
3909 views - <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2011/02/knee-pain-ouch.html">Knee Pain - Ouch!</a><br />
3144 views - <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/05/an-interview-with-ebth-sales-specialist.html">An Interview with EBTH Sales Specialist Brittney Forrister</a><br />
2096 views - <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2012/11/smitten-kitchen-love.html">Smitten Kitchen Love</a><br />
2068 views - <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/10/an-interview-with-goodwill-marketing.html">An Interview with Goodwill Marketing Manager Niketa Hailey-Hill</a><br />
1981 views - <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2012/08/training-for-triathlon-omg-so-much-gear.html">Training For A Triathlon - OMG, SO MUCH GEAR!!! $$$</a><br />
1363 views - <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/10/an-interview-with-attorney-and-fashion.html">An Interview with Attorney and Fashion Blogger Betsey Appleton</a><br />
1328 views - <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2009/10/easy-lasagna.html">Easy Lasagna</a><br />
1312 views - <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2016/10/an-interview-with-bfabfitness.html">An Interview with b.fab.fitness Instructor Katherine Tisha Wilson</a><br />
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So what are my plans for the future? Glad you asked! A couple of things. One, I'm switching platforms, because lol Blogger. I actually tried to move to Wordpress about 4 years ago, but ultimately didn't because I would have lost all my pageviews and stats. Now you can move and keep your shizz, so I'm moving. TBD Wordpress or Squarespace.<br />
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My other plan for the future is to post more. Over the last couple of years I've quit writing personal posts. It's just not where I'm at anymore, but I'd like more variety on my blog. Right now, it's almost exclusively These My Bitches. In 2018, I may aim for 4 posts a month: 2 These My Bitches, 1 biz/social media post, and 1 personal-ish post. We'll see. I've got to figure out how to redistribute my creativity. Right now, all of it is going into my job and what little is left is going into Instagram Stories of my dog talking to me through thought bubbles.<br />
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Thank you to everyone who reads these posts, likes and comments on Facebook. I didn't set out to became "a brand", but somewhere along the way, I did. And that brand enabled me to start a <a href="http://www.theblondemule.com/">social media business</a> in 2014 that is doing quite well, thank you very much.<br />
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At Porter Flea over the weekend, I was overwhelmed by how many vendors (and shoppers) are <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">Bitches</a>. It's the first time I've really come face to face with how many Nashville women have been featured on my blog - all because I had this bizarre idea a few years ago to start writing about my friends' jobs.<br />
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Thank you, thank you, thank you! I'd say here's to 10 more years, but I'm not convinced we'll still have free internet in 2027. To quote sheroes, Aminatou and Ann, "See you on the internet, boo!"The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-30902347648827084832017-12-11T17:29:00.000-06:002017-12-11T17:29:06.404-06:00An Interview with Certified Iyengar Yoga Teacher Rachel Mathenia<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Things that don't come naturally to me: trust, vulnerability, being upside down. Guess what I have to do once a week in Rachel's yoga class? Uh huh. It's got to be hard enough to teach yoga to a recovering competitive perfectionist, but imagine one with PTSD. Rachel knows I don't feel safe in certain poses, like backbends, so she stands behind me and puts her hand on my back, which has the immediate effect of making me feel safe. She not only holds space for me, she calms me down and makes me laugh. There's a reason she's everyone's favorite yoga teacher.<br />
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Rachel is more than a teacher, she is a healer, a spiritual guide, and a wondrously ridiculous weirdo. She wears Wonderoos, listens to the same music your high school boyfriend did, and travels around town with a jug-sized mason jar of goddess knows what, assuredly some kind of beet-sauerkraut smoothie. It took her two years to fill out this questionnaire, so please read it thoroughly. Meet my yoga teacher, my friend, the healer of my knee injuries, Rachel Mathenia!<br />
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<b>What is your job title and where do you teach?</b><br />
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I am a CIYT (certified Iyengar Yoga teacher) and IAYT (International Association of Yoga Therapists). Since 2005, I have taught mainly at the <a href="http://12southyoga.com/">Iyengar Yoga Center of Nashville</a> and have also been the assistant director to Aretha Blevins for most of that time. I also teach one class a week at <a href="https://www.steadfastandtrueyoga.com/">Steadfast and True Yoga</a>, as well as private yoga classes.<br />
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<b>When did you first learn about this field of work?</b><br />
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I took a yoga class at Middle Tennessee State University for a P.E. credit.<br />
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<b>How did you know it was what you wanted to do?</b><br />
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I was in my third class, lying in savasana, and I had this premonition that I would do yoga for the rest of my life and that I would teach it. It really is a calling for me. It's a challenging path that is very rewarding, but I have had many times when I have thought that I needed to figure out another career to have security, but I really don't want to do anything else.<br />
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<b>What was your path that lead you to the job you have now?</b><br />
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When I became curious about teaching yoga in 2001, there was only one yoga teacher training program in Nashville. The Southern Institute for Yoga Instruction, led by John Charping and Betty Larson. They were the owners of the now closed Yoga Room in Berry Hill. I attended that 1,000 hour program over 13 months. I consider it grace that they taught the Iyengar method and that it is really the only style of yoga that I have studied. I loved the therapeutic aspect of the method and the scientific approach that encourages creativity. No two Iyengar classes will ever be the same!<br />
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My first regular teaching gig was at the University School of Nashville, teaching yoga in the middle school. Aretha was teaching Latin there and she had just taken over ownership of 12South Yoga (aka Iyengar Yoga Center of Nashville) and she asked me to teach a teens class. I gradually took on more classes and she asked me to be her assistant after a few years of teaching there. Eleven years ago, I took my first workshop with my teacher Manouso Manos. He has the reputation of being one of the best yoga therapeutics teachers in the world. He has helped me tremendously with my own health issues and I continue to study therapeutics with him.<br />
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<b>Favorite piece of advice, business or otherwise? </b><br />
<br />
“Rest in reason, move in passion” -Khalil Gibran<br />
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<b>Failure you learned from or that helped you improve the way you teach?</b><br />
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Well, I have little failures in class everyday that I try to learn from. My “teacher training” has never ended. I continue to refine my teaching skills, study, and practice every day.<br />
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<b>What would you do with two more hours a day?</b><br />
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Practice, spend more time with family and friends, read more, make art. Oh! And I also am studying Vedic astrology now.<br />
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<b>What is your greatest success (or something you’re most proud of) in your professional life?</b><br />
<br />
It makes me so happy when I find out my students have developed a personal practice. One of my goals of teaching is to teach people how to use yoga as a medicine to lessen suffering.<br />
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<b>What’s the first app or website you open when you wake up in the morning?</b><br />
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Probably Instagram. But I check my email first and often end up reading something from a website I am subscribed to like, <a href="https://www.joyfulbelly.com/">Joyful Belly Ayurveda</a>.<br />
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<b>How do you decompress at the end of the work day?</b><br />
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My schedule is kind of weird. I teach private classes sometimes as early as 7am, but I also teach evening classes every week night. So I decompress in the middle of the day. During this time I practice, cook my biggest meal of the day and hang out with my two dogs and husband, who works from home. I love to cook. It's meditative to me, but also is a way for me to be creative. I love food as medicine and I love to cook for people.<br />
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<b>What’s the hardest thing about your job that isn’t obvious?</b><br />
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Oh wow! There's a lot. People have no idea how challenging it is to teach yoga well. As we are learning in the West, there is no separation of the body and mind, so when you are teaching 1- 40 people how to do these poses, you are dealing with their muscles and bones, but more importantly their trauma and their egos and their insecurities and their stories about themselves. The practice of yoga is transformational by nature so it makes people more sensitive. If you're practicing by yourself at home it can be a balm and you can experience your emotions in private. But when one is in a class it can create feelings of vulnerability when these emotions come up. And as the teacher, I not only have to pay attention to everyone's alignment to protect them from injury, but also be sensitive to their emotions.<br />
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<b>What is one thing everyone gets wrong about what you do?</b><br />
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Hmmmmmm, right now, goats. I kid! < See what I did there. Maybe that my job is relaxing and easy? I think people also assume that you get a practice in when you teach yoga but in the Iyengar tradition we don't practice while we teach. We watch and instruct the students from what we see in front of us. We will show them how to do the pose but that is a demonstration, not an inward experience.<br />
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<b>Lastly, and most important, what is your favorite TV show and what is your favorite snack?</b><br />
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Right now I love <i>Stranger Things</i>, <i>Outlander</i>, and <i>Transparent</i>. Of all time... anything Jim Henson was involved in. My favorite snack right now is melted cheese on a corn tortilla with sauerkraut or kimchi, and avocado because I usually have one in my kitchen.<br />
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<i>All photos courtesy of Rachel Mathenia</i><br />
<i><br /></i>P.S. Read more about Rachel in <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/04/my-story-of-yoga.html">My Story of Yoga</a>.<br />
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P.P.S. Meet last week's bitch: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/12/an-interview-with-jdrf-development.html">JDRF Development Manager, Victoria Cumbow</a>!The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-27746284567312199102017-12-04T17:30:00.000-06:002017-12-04T17:30:31.434-06:00An Interview with JDRF Development Manager Victoria Cumbow<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Would you believe me if I told you I own a fancy bike that I used to ride around town and race with? Well, hold on to your butts because it's true. And it's how I know today's bitch. I joined a cycling team in 2014 to get ready for a big race. I was on group rides with women who rode at 100mph (rough approximation) and Victoria befriended me and made sure I didn't get left behind. The cycling team didn't last, but the friendship did.<br />
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I don't ride my bike that often anymore, but when I do, I ride with Victoria. She reminds me of what I love about exercise - talking! Victoria is fun, kind, and loyal. Do you know all of your neighbors? Victoria does. Do you plan events to raise a million dollars to help cure a disease you've had since you were 11? Victoria does. Do you take it in stride when your 41-year old friend tells you she will not respond to group texts? Victoria does. Meet one of my favorite friends, Victoria Cumbow!<br />
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<b>What is your job title and where do you work?</b><br />
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I’m a Development Manager with the <a href="http://www.jdrf.org/midtennessee/">Middle Tennessee Chapter of JDRF</a>, (formerly known as Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation). While I manage a few events in our chapter, my main responsibilities include the Blue Jean Ball (a songwriter’s round and fundraising event held in Murfreesboro each fall) and the Promise Gala (a $1.5 million Gala held in Nashville each spring).<br />
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<b>When did you first learn about this field of work? How did you know it was what you wanted to do?</b><br />
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That’s a loaded question. I learned about JDRF after being diagnosed with type 1 diabetes when I was 11 years old. Back then, it was known as JDF, and my family became involved after my diagnosis. When I was diagnosed, we didn’t know any other families with children who had type 1, but after connecting with JDRF, we met so many others whose lives were like ours. I fell away from JDRF as a college student and young adult. I studied journalism at Auburn and was a newspaper reporter for many years (my actual calling). I was assigned to cover the local JDRF Walk one year, and I reconnected to the organization then. Through my local chapter, I made some friends that participated in the JDRF Ride to Cure Diabetes. It’s a destination bike ride that serves as a tremendous fundraiser. I hadn’t been on a bicycle since I was probably 13 years old, but the year I turned 30, I set out for Death Valley, California, to pedal 100 miles in the desert on my 25-year-old Fuji road bike I’d bought for $50. I literally thought I was going to die in the desert that day, but I managed to find 72 miles in my legs and finished the ride. I’ve been riding ever since, and that’s how I ended up in this role.<br />
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After moving back to Nashville, I became the Ride coach for the local JDRF Ride team, which segued into my joining the staff. I’m now in the middle of planning my third million-plus dollar Promise Gala, and I love JDRF with all my heart. It’s a wonderful organization with great leadership, and I’m incredibly proud to be part of this chapter. There are only five of us here, but we produce record-breaking events, and we have a higher efficiency rate than the national average, meaning we contribute 90% of what we raise to JDRF’s mission. I’m incredibly proud of that because I live with this disease day-in and day-out. The more we can contribute to research, the more everyone benefits. It’s personal, and I think that’s where my passion comes from. Some days, I miss journalism terribly. Actually, that’s not true. I miss what journalism used to be; I don’t miss what it has become now. (But that’s a whole other story.)<br />
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<b>What is the best piece of business advice you’ve been given?</b><br />
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Pray. My father taught me this lesson in high school when I landed my first job, and it’s been true in every role I’ve ever held. My current career has a tendency to be incredibly hectic and stressful and in those seasons, it is very easy to find yourself emotionally drained. I feel things deeply, and when my stress level is high, I often find myself collapsing alone under a pile of tears. Praying centers me and gives me clarity on making decisions and finding peace. I am calm and rational when my spiritual life is a priority.<br />
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<b>Can you name the biggest lesson you’ve learned or that helped improve the way you work?</b><br />
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Margin. When I was younger, I was incredibly focused on my career. I worked long hours and put everything I had into my journalism career. It was my calling, and I felt like I was making a difference in my community. When the print publishing industry shifted and I had to transition to a new career, I was lost. Fortunately, I found the sport of cycling around that same time. I fell in love with riding my bike, and it gave me a way to center myself and clear my head. The beauty of cycling is the freedom. You see the world differently and with a fresh perspective. You can’t talk on the phone or answer emails when you’re riding a bike through the country. You’re forced to be alone with your thoughts, and while that can be scary at first, it becomes a freeing experience and an exercise in self-care. If I don’t plan margin in my personal life, my work life suffers. My current role makes it easy to fall back into that habit of working 13-hour days. I’m very lucky that I found a need for margin before I found this job. I have to have boundaries and take care of my mental well-being before I can be successful in anything else.<br />
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<b>What would you do with 2 more hours a day?</b><br />
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Find stillness. My favorite time of the day is the early morning. I will often get up an hour or two before my day needs to begin just to have the opportunity to be still. It’s the only time in the day when the rest of the world is quiet. No one’s on email yet or clamoring for your attention. No one needs me, and I’m not running from appointment to appointment. The world is still dark and quiet, and it’s my favorite space in the entire day. Sometimes I pray and read my Bible. Sometimes I just sit on the couch with my dog because I really like being in my house. When I’m in my busy season at work, those quiet mornings become sparse, and if I had two more hours a day, I’d add them to the mornings.<br />
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<b>What is your greatest success, or something you’re most proud of related to what you do?</b><br />
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Our efficiency rate. My chapter of JDRF is able to contribute 90% of what we raise to JDRF’s mission of curing, treating and preventing type 1 diabetes. That’s huge, and it’s well above the national average for non-profits. I work hard to ensure that percentage stays high because contributing to research is why I do what I do.<br />
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<b>How do you decompress at the end of the work day?</b><br />
<br />
I often go straight from work to another commitment. When I’m finally home for the evening, my favorite space is on my porch or in my hammock with my dog, a glass of wine and Emmylou on the record player. Tennessee weather allows me to soak in nights like this most of the year.<br />
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<b>What’s a fear that keeps you up at night?</b><br />
<br />
Making people feel small. I’m a relational person, and I love meeting new people and spending time in social settings. At the end of the day, my head is always spinning as I think back on everything that happened that day. The moments that bother me the most are when I think I’ve let someone down or when I think someone felt marginalized by me. Everyone has value, and because I work in the donor-centric field of development, I want everyone I encounter to feel valued and worthy regardless of where they come from, what they do or their ability to give. I’m sure I fail constantly at this, but it’s something I think about frequently. We live in a world with loud voices and they are coming from every side. It’s easy to become a wallflower. My hope is when I’m around people, they know they matter, are important and that they feel loved and appreciated.<br />
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<b>What is one thing everyone gets wrong about what you do?</b><br />
<br />
I’m more than an event planner. My role allows me to wear many hats. I’m a fundraiser and a relationship builder. I manage logistics, décor and all the pieces that go into events, sure, but the most fun part of my job is the relationship piece. We have an incredible board of directors for our chapter, and they are such a huge piece of our success. Those relationships, along with those of our donors, families and constituents, are the best part of what I get to do every day! You can’t plan a $1.6 million gala alone, and I love the people I get to do this job with throughout the year!<br />
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<br />
<b>What does self care look like in your life?</b><br />
<br />
My self care is prayer and being outdoors. My spiritual life is what centers me, and my reset button is being outside. In fact, when this piece is published, I’ll be hundreds of miles away backpacking and camping in the desert! Outside is my favorite place to be, especially with friends, and it’s where I find energy, peace and stillness.<br />
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<b>What helps when you’re stuck? Do you have a motto or quote that inspires/motivates you?</b><br />
<br />
Prayer. That seems simple, but it makes a difference. There’s a piece of scripture in Philippians about having a peace that surpasses all understanding, and it’s on the heels of another verse about not being anxious, but rather praying in those moments. For me, it’s that. I can go from zero-to-sixty real quick, but a few minutes spent in prayer will re-align me and give me a peace and clarity that nothing else can.<br />
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<b>Are there any women who helped pave the way for your success?</b><br />
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My mother and my grandmothers. I come from a long line of women who seemingly did it all. They worked full-time jobs, along with balancing marriages and children. Knowing what I know now as a 35-year-old woman, I see the sacrifices they made and the lessons they taught me. I didn’t plan on growing up to be single in my mid-30s, but that’s where my life has ventured, and I am so grateful for women who showed me how to do that. Feminist wasn’t a common term when my grandmothers were growing up, but they absolutely were. I think the greatest of these is my mother. As a child with a chronic illness, we had to manage life differently. My mother showed me how to live life to the fullest regardless of what roadblocks I faced. Her example and the way she and my dad raised me, allowed me to be independent and a dreamer. My outlook on life is because of them and their refusal to let me wallow or feel sorry for myself. There has never been a time in my life when I mentioned an idea or a dream that my mother didn’t encourage me to do.<br />
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<b>Lastly, and most important, what is your favorite TV show and what is your favorite snack?</b><br />
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I don’t really watch TV shows, and I have cable mostly for sports (and formerly for news before our current administration took over. I can’t much stomach the news any longer.) But my guilty pleasure is a cheesy rom-coms. It’s terrible, really. I know it, but I keep doing it. I’m a hopeless romantic, and I think that’s why I watch. I can’t believe I’m sharing this publicly, but it’s true. My name is Victoria, and I have terrible taste in movies.<br />
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My favorite snack (assuming you’re not including wine as a snack) are hot buffalo flavored pretzels. They are addictive, and you’ve been warned. Don’t look at the nutritional facts though; no one needs that kind of negativity in their life. I only buy them on road trips because if they’re in my house, I have no self-discipline. They’re my self-indulgent travel treat.<br />
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<i>All photos courtesy of Victoria Cumbow</i><br />
<i><br /></i>P.S. Meet last week's bitch: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/11/an-interview-with-retail-manager-and.html">Retail Manager and Blogger, Audrey Rhodes</a>!<br />
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P.P.S. Full list of My Bitches <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">here</a>.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-29640183944711771362017-11-27T14:59:00.000-06:002017-11-27T14:59:18.973-06:00An Interview with Retail Manager and Blogger Audrey Rhodes<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzUCj28l-Zl-lKslUotXusDt7222mYwSJx5OXkKx8d74vwMZ6A4ttUfqXD4g7cZ1trPipADQ_hD9Zb0BaD7fWPoLIlIUX8mVLHfUzHwT51aXm_RzMmBxSmFOcZ99kK3ZxX0MRj0z7Tnity/s1600/TMB+Audrey.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1068" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzUCj28l-Zl-lKslUotXusDt7222mYwSJx5OXkKx8d74vwMZ6A4ttUfqXD4g7cZ1trPipADQ_hD9Zb0BaD7fWPoLIlIUX8mVLHfUzHwT51aXm_RzMmBxSmFOcZ99kK3ZxX0MRj0z7Tnity/s400/TMB+Audrey.jpeg" width="266" /></a></div>
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There's a Maya Angelou quote about creativity that I love, "You can't use up creativity. The more you use, the more you have." If you want to see this principle in action, scroll through the <a href="https://www.instagram.com/affectionatelyaudrey/">Instagram feed</a> of today's bitch. Every time Audrey posts an outfit pic I wonder when she will run out of clothes and/or ideas. Spoiler alert: she won't.<br />
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My favorite thing about Audrey is that a lot of my friends know her, but don't know I'm friends with her, so they'll tell me about her and say we should be friends and I'm like, lol, we are. Okay, I lied, that isn't my favorite thing. My favorite thing about Audrey is that on any given day she has paired a designer $1,100 top with $6 Goodwill pants. She is a master of mixing high and low fashion and that is MY JAM. Meet today's bitch, Audrey Rhodes!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbIuKCjsdw_JelDa9Lr0VRHZGPn6qYD4upG3vqNmNTB5_qlEXYNAaxY0KTY3A5Uw8FvGuLuu1hhCIfO-TchFv-lpq8JLEV2muiprqul_ZobNx364J1FT0nXFQvJeWkH_Q_ydQzZqmod46O/s1600/dsc03799.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1122" data-original-width="748" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbIuKCjsdw_JelDa9Lr0VRHZGPn6qYD4upG3vqNmNTB5_qlEXYNAaxY0KTY3A5Uw8FvGuLuu1hhCIfO-TchFv-lpq8JLEV2muiprqul_ZobNx364J1FT0nXFQvJeWkH_Q_ydQzZqmod46O/s400/dsc03799.jpg" width="266" /></a></div>
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<b>What do you do and what is the name of your blog?</b><br />
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I work at a really amazing store here in Nashville called <a href="https://shopual.com/">UAL</a> (United Apparel Liquidators), as a Manager and Strategic Sales Director by day and I style funky fashion on my blog, <a href="https://affectionately-audrey.com/">Affectionately, Audrey</a>, by night.<br />
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<b>When did you first learn about fashion bloggers? How did you know it was what you wanted to do?</b><br />
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I was first exposed to bloggers through social media, no surprise there. I decided to start a blog while I still lived in my small hometown in Georgia, but felt stuck in a box and unable to truly explore what I wanted my style to be. You know, Southern tradition and all. It wasn’t until I moved to Nashville that my blog and style really flourished. To be honest, I’m still not sure blogging is what I want to do, but I do know I love helping people have the confidence to wear what they love and blogging helps me do that!<br />
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<b>What is the best piece of business advice you’ve been given?</b><br />
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One of my officer friends who had been married a long time once told me that relationships are not 50-50 but 51-49 and if you are constantly the one trying to give the 51% then how can your relationship ever fail. Ever since then I have tried to implement that piece of advice in all my relationships and it has worked. It has also made me a much more selfless person, which was much needed, ha ha!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmMVSMe065Nj6R9752W6ruJahkLLYuD0l7BkgZX0MkqKLg1BHggQTJ5GioW4aZJtZz5ry4r_NQsHJuImwSmP7snV7KogBVH8o7o63C_jdymyExVMpBdGaIOlSxI5-Xl1DHXGq6Xl9s7npX/s1600/DSC04204copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1068" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmMVSMe065Nj6R9752W6ruJahkLLYuD0l7BkgZX0MkqKLg1BHggQTJ5GioW4aZJtZz5ry4r_NQsHJuImwSmP7snV7KogBVH8o7o63C_jdymyExVMpBdGaIOlSxI5-Xl1DHXGq6Xl9s7npX/s400/DSC04204copy.jpg" width="266" /></a></div>
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<b>Can you name the biggest lesson you’ve learned or that helped improve the way you work?</b><br />
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To absolutely not care what people think about you. To not care when they stare at you because you are different or the hurtful things they might say. People will always put down what they do not understand or people they perceive as different. Inspired people often make uninspired people feel insecure, resulting in defense mechanisms like harsh words or mean looks. I chose a long time ago to not let those people dictate how I feel about myself or how I dressed.<br />
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<b>What would you do with 2 more hours a day?</b><br />
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Thrift/explore new places or read and spend time with my pup, Parker.<br />
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<b>What is your greatest success, or something you’re most proud of related to what you do?</b><br />
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One of my great successes is becoming a Police Officer in my home state of Georgia. Most people don’t know this about me, but I was the only girl to graduate from my 11-week mandate class (Officer training) with the highest academic grade. I am very proud of that accomplishment. The thing I am most proud of now is how far I pushed myself while here in Nashville and how far my style and life has progressed through choosing to unabashedly be myself despite what anyone thinks or says.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiknsNOj31FzuBqReThlanHXID2ZjgHB8Nqsr27o4SM6x09hRHucmJ7S9Fb2Zszko9d3_iIcrvcri6R2LYM4PXFQ0vIMYtQspHpsgyEd3LS_Pogq2Q83zAcG4H2ECEuL4KyDH6CZIgnSmdI/s1600/DSC00311copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1068" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiknsNOj31FzuBqReThlanHXID2ZjgHB8Nqsr27o4SM6x09hRHucmJ7S9Fb2Zszko9d3_iIcrvcri6R2LYM4PXFQ0vIMYtQspHpsgyEd3LS_Pogq2Q83zAcG4H2ECEuL4KyDH6CZIgnSmdI/s400/DSC00311copy.jpg" width="266" /></a></div>
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<b>How do you decompress at the end of the work day?</b><br />
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I love music, so that always helps me relax along with about 30 minutes to be by myself with that music. That being said, I am a venter. Talking about the stressful points of my day always helps me relax and remove that stress from my mind. My boyfriend and best friend help with that often, bless their souls.<br />
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<b>What’s a fear that keeps you up at night?</b><br />
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I truly don’t have a lot of fears. I am a pretty upfront, logical person so I generally work through any fears that come up and decide whether they are worth my time or not. But the fear I find myself fighting the most is being unsuccessful or uninspiring.<br />
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<b>What is one thing everyone gets wrong about what you do?</b><br />
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That I have been stylish my whole life and came out of the womb mixing prints. I know it is easy to look at my funky style and instantly have that perception of me, but it is very wrong. It took me a decent amount of time to be “good” at what I do and I learn something new everyday. I don’t always feel confident or great about what I’m wearing, but I just choose to push past those doubts and hit the ground running anyway. Side note for those who doubt me, I used to look like a boy and got mistaken for one many times. So yeah... the whole style thing took some time!<br />
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<b>What does self care look like in your life?</b><br />
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Taking the time to do the things I love and be with the people I love, which honestly doesn’t always happen. I always feel like I have a million things to do, so sometimes I just have to make myself ignore all those things and do what I know will rejuvenate and re-inspire me.<br />
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<b>What helps when you’re stuck? Do you have a motto or quote that inspires/motivates you?</b><br />
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I try and seek inspiration from the things and people around me. I look through magazines or social media fashion or just run through my closet and get inspired by a piece in the back I had forgotten about. I also just try to remember that being uninspired is a natural part of the creative process, not an incurable disease. Once I accept that, I feel free to work through it until I feel inspiration flowing freely again.<br />
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<b>Are there any women who helped pave the way for your success?</b><br />
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My mom and my “second mom” (the mother of my best friend growing up) along with all three of my sisters and two of my best friends, Lyndsay and Lily! I also had amazing grandmothers who never ceased to show me love and support. I am truly blessed by the women in my life!<br />
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<b>Lastly, and most important, what is your favorite TV show and what is your favorite snack?</b><br />
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Yikes, that’s tough. All time favorite TV shows would have to be <i>Seinfeld</i>, <i>X-Files</i>, or <i>Twilight Zone</i> (I realize that’s three, oops). Snack would be coffee and a brownie or chocolate chip cookie.<br />
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<i>All photos courtesy of Audrey Rhodes</i><br />
<i><br /></i>P.S. Meet last week's bitch: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/11/an-interview-with-blogger-sheena-steward.html">Blogger, Sheena Steward</a>!<br />
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P.P.S. Full list of My Bitches <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">here</a>.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-80081290365681731292017-11-15T08:59:00.000-06:002017-11-15T08:59:23.672-06:002017 Reading Round Up, Part Three<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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As a reminder, these are off-the-cuff reviews that I peck into my phone as soon as I finish the book. A literary critic, I am not.<br />
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Here's what I've been reading!<br />
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/32920226-sing-unburied-sing" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Sing, Unburied, Sing" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1499340866m/32920226.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/32920226-sing-unburied-sing">Sing, Unburied, Sing</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/1676417.Jesmyn_Ward">Jesmyn Ward</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2119363580">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Beautifully written, haunting, sad. I didn't get into it as much as I expected based on how much everyone else loves it. I liked it though and it's a short book. I did love the story of Jojo and his sister Kayla. The chapters from Leonie's (the mom) perspective were harder to read.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/31423188-startup" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Startup" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1473240187m/31423188.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/31423188-startup">Startup</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/2299937.Doree_Shafrir">Doree Shafrir</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1976479327">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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If you want a fun way to spend a weekend, pick up this book. It's super short and super fun. I loved it. Weird abrupt ending, but great book.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/33381433-we-are-never-meeting-in-real-life" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="We Are Never Meeting In Real Life" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1481727131m/33381433.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/33381433-we-are-never-meeting-in-real-life">We Are Never Meeting In Real Life</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/6896957.Samantha_Irby">Samantha Irby</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1983127539">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Man, this book is so good! I'm biased because I love Samantha Irby and will devour anything she writes, but do yourself a favor and pick up this heartfelt, hilarious book.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/32572166-the-rules-do-not-apply" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="The Rules Do Not Apply" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1490082071m/32572166.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/32572166-the-rules-do-not-apply">The Rules Do Not Apply</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/11286.Ariel_Levy">Ariel Levy</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2025008592">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Harrowing, gripping, beautiful. Short book that you can read in a couple sittings. If you're a woman, make sure you know what it's about first. Brb, reading every article Ariel Levy has written for <i>The New Yorker</i>.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/11590._Salem_s_Lot" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="'Salem's Lot" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1327891565m/11590.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/11590._Salem_s_Lot">'Salem's Lot</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/3389.Stephen_King">Stephen King</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2118723275">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Scary and suspenseful. This is his second book, and it's from the early 70s, so there's some non-PC language. Great book. Fun to read close to Halloween.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/34565022-braving-the-wilderness" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1501487391m/34565022.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/34565022-braving-the-wilderness">Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/162578.Bren_Brown">Brené Brown</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2136081747">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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This book is kind of a companion guide to all the things Brene has been saying in her FB videos and book tour this year. It's a great book that everyone I know has really enjoyed and benefited from. It's also super short. I read it in two days. It's intended to be read by anyone in any political party, but if you're a liberal or progressive living in a red state, this book offers some solace.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/41950.Quentins" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Quentins" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1169806796m/41950.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/41950.Quentins">Quentins</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/3532.Maeve_Binchy">Maeve Binchy</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2099796715">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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I love these Maeve Binchy books so much. Don't @ me.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/29780253-born-a-crime" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Born a Crime: Stories From a South African Childhood" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1473867911m/29780253.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/29780253-born-a-crime">Born a Crime: Stories From a South African Childhood</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/15149526.Trevor_Noah">Trevor Noah</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2081638566">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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A friend recommended I listen to this as an audio book, and I'm so glad I did. Trevor recorded the audio and I loved hearing him tell his story, plus the accents, languages, and impersonations. I especially loved the end when he tells the story of his mom. The way he peels back the curtain of family abuse and domestic violence is thoughtful and well done. The ending had me laughing and crying in my car. Great book.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/33155774-do-not-become-alarmed" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Do Not Become Alarmed" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1482644401m/33155774.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/33155774-do-not-become-alarmed">Do Not Become Alarmed</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/10739.Maile_Meloy">Maile Meloy</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2110705358">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Couldn't put it down. Kind of brutal, kid violence wise, but great book.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/28440194-in-the-company-of-women" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="In the Company of Women: Inspiration and Advice from over 100 Makers, Artists, and Entrepreneurs" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1463042506m/28440194.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/28440194-in-the-company-of-women">In the Company of Women: Inspiration and Advice from over 100 Makers, Artists, and Entrepreneurs</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4584671.Grace_Bonney">Grace Bonney</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1849821455">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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This book is so helpful and inspiring. I've been reading it off and on for months and finally finished it. I marked a bunch of pages and passages and plan to flip through it whenever I feel stuck. It's a must-have for women creatives and entrepreneurs, or anyone who just wants to be inspired.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/22716447-why-not-me" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Why Not Me?" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1442548684m/22716447.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/22716447-why-not-me">Why Not Me?</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/194416.Mindy_Kaling">Mindy Kaling</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1373595937">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Hilarious and totally worth the read. Favorite sentence: "While I chewed on my eleven brioche rolls, I saw the likes of Gen. David Patraeus, Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand, and that guy from Magic Mike, who also played a hot werewolf and was supposed to have a huge wang."
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/32498038-theft-by-finding" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Theft by Finding: Diaries 1977-2002" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1492298272m/32498038.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/32498038-theft-by-finding">Theft by Finding: Diaries 1977-2002</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/2849.David_Sedaris">David Sedaris</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2026184949">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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So unbelievably funny. It's meant to be read in spurts, but I read it cover to cover in about a week. I couldn't put it down. Hilarious.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/30753828-the-road-to-jonestown" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="The Road to Jonestown: Jim Jones and Peoples Temple" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1486855833m/30753828.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/30753828-the-road-to-jonestown">The Road to Jonestown: Jim Jones and Peoples Temple</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/149171.Jeff_Guinn">Jeff Guinn</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2041782809">3 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Two words: IN DEPTH. This book is long and heavy, physically and emotionally. This isn't just a book. It's a masters class on Jim Jones and Peoples Temple. Fascinating, exhausting, deeply disturbing, horrific. People forget this happened in our lifetime. I was two years old when this happened. We haven't learned this lesson yet. Demagogues are still out there. Hell, we just elected one as President. There's a lot to be learned from this book.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/31176294-who-thought-this-was-a-good-idea" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Who Thought This Was a Good Idea?: And Other Questions You Should Have Answers to When You Work in the White House" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1480286429m/31176294.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/31176294-who-thought-this-was-a-good-idea">Who Thought This Was a Good Idea?: And Other Questions You Should Have Answers to When You Work in the White House</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/15502244.Alyssa_Mastromonaco">Alyssa Mastromonaco</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2058236929">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Finally! A work memoir that's not just cliche advice like 'don't cry in front of your boss' and 'never bake cupcakes for your coworkers'. Read this, and then buy copies for all the young women in your life. FYI, this book will make you really miss Obama.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/30971707-all-grown-up" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="All Grown Up" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1474640655m/30971707.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/30971707-all-grown-up">All Grown Up</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/215765.Jami_Attenberg">Jami Attenberg</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1868949538">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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I looooved this book! It has all my favorite ingredients: female protagonist, NYC setting, ambivalent single lady in the city, family dysfunction, shitty job, confusion over life goals, alcohol, sex, drugs. I just made this book sound really dark, and it isn't. It's a great book! Just read it. You'll thank me.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17383989-jab-jab-jab-right-hook" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Jab, Jab, Jab, Right Hook: How to Tell Your Story in a Noisy Social World" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1363289972m/17383989.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17383989-jab-jab-jab-right-hook">Jab, Jab, Jab, Right Hook: How to Tell Your Story in a Noisy Social World</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/1371305.Gary_Vaynerchuk">Gary Vaynerchuk</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2045227181">1 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Ugh, this book. Why are there books on social media? By the time it's on the shelves, it's outdated. First of all, this book is unapologetically written for men. Aside from the fact that the title is a sports metaphor, the cover is a picture of boxing gloves, and the filler pages are high gloss red, the first paragraph in the intro is a football analogy. Imagine me raising my middle finger into the air right now. If you're a dude who thinks he's good at Facebook, and could be better, here's your book. If you're anyone else, and specifically if you're a woman, just read an article anywhere on the internet and save yourself the excruciating frustration of another man telling you how to do something you probably innately already know how to do.
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/30688435-exit-west" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Exit West" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1477324680m/30688435.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/30688435-exit-west">Exit West</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/16902.Mohsin_Hamid">Mohsin Hamid</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1953985600">3 of 5 stars</a><br />
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I don't know what to say about this book. I liked it. The language and the writing is beautiful. I didn't feel an emotional attachment to the book or the characters, but I'm glad I read it. The story and the perspective are so unique, I'd recommend reading it. Plus, it's short and you'll read it quickly. It's a good book.
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P.S. Forgot what I read in the second part of 2017? <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/07/2017-reading-round-up-part-two.html">Here</a> you go!<br />
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P.P.S. Are we <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/kimbaldwin76">friends on Goodreads</a>?The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-68246919401515032392017-11-13T14:58:00.000-06:002017-11-13T14:58:16.269-06:00An Interview with Blogger Sheena Steward<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOikLDj-PVtUv18dBIuN-3h6FGhBYUZc9KPRoETou2-Gl_Uhdy5TB2er8kPqeZmUmJE5b00G9SC7zqVbVAkoXTVz-XZWMc3XgocjCvn4rdZl1Yz7NpdxETn1YJNt8kUNPmsAqc9NzIOT4U/s1600/TMB+Sheena.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1068" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOikLDj-PVtUv18dBIuN-3h6FGhBYUZc9KPRoETou2-Gl_Uhdy5TB2er8kPqeZmUmJE5b00G9SC7zqVbVAkoXTVz-XZWMc3XgocjCvn4rdZl1Yz7NpdxETn1YJNt8kUNPmsAqc9NzIOT4U/s400/TMB+Sheena.jpeg" width="266" /></a></div>
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You know those people you follow on Instagram and you're like, I <i>know</i> we would be friends if we knew each other in real life? I've thought that about Sheena for awhile now. From her Insta feed, I knew I liked her sense of humor, style, and inability to take a bad picture. But then I started reading her blog and I was blown away by her honesty and vulnerability. Reading her blog reminded me why I started a blog in the first place, to talk about my life.<br />
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A self-described, "Thrift Store Queen," if you've been to any of the Goodwill Style With A Purpose events, you've probably met Sheena. That's actually where I finally met Sheena, at the last event in Bellevue. Our racks were beside each other and by the end of the night, I had badgered her into spending a day with me eating tacos and thrifting our way down Nolensville Road. Meet my new friend and today's bitch, Sheena Steward!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpxzBDXTKYPFyBvXwRzvYj_AOzdBaaJNDNxrTmds_P6FbnNLHkK0wKkLt3x87cWe4mZHld3lBzkfyP5ZhcioXLpyS90lWdDhnc6CDh81o13IeZfkvS6pTp48NBuxT4gUOZeH91nnwUktRd/s1600/Screenshot_20171101-100706.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="714" data-original-width="1079" height="263" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpxzBDXTKYPFyBvXwRzvYj_AOzdBaaJNDNxrTmds_P6FbnNLHkK0wKkLt3x87cWe4mZHld3lBzkfyP5ZhcioXLpyS90lWdDhnc6CDh81o13IeZfkvS6pTp48NBuxT4gUOZeH91nnwUktRd/s400/Screenshot_20171101-100706.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<b>What do you do and what is the name of your blog?</b><br />
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By day, I’m an IT recruiter for a healthcare organization. By night, I’m a <a href="https://loveatanystage.com/">blogger</a>, public speaker and do-gooder. Yep, that’s a real word!<br />
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<b>When did you first learn about blogging? How did you know it was what you wanted to do?</b><br />
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Blogging happened accidentally for me. My husband and I got married in 2016, and started having weekly dates shortly after we married. I posted the dates on social media, and through those social media posts a blog was born. December will be a year anniversary of the blog, and it’s morphed from a date night blog to a full-on lifestyle/relationship blog. I knew blogging was for me because it married (pun intended) so many of the things I love. Hence the name of my blog, <a href="https://loveatanystage.com/">Love At Any Stage</a>. I’m able to write about life, marriage, dates, my truths, thrifting and anything else that moves me.<br />
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<b>What is the best piece of business advice you’ve been given?</b><br />
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Just get started.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAsymWr0NisCv75h5IEqP_1LNPCjB25DQ5trtmKs4ndRCF-P7oO3A55z73A4sm2WJnoGmJZtmFw1NFHd5WybUjVJEC33uYPx1LudGuecs1YMBNMQz21MI5FFc2SFH35lO3MbU5EECX44fg/s1600/Resized_Ivory-Door-Studio-Birthday-0026.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1068" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAsymWr0NisCv75h5IEqP_1LNPCjB25DQ5trtmKs4ndRCF-P7oO3A55z73A4sm2WJnoGmJZtmFw1NFHd5WybUjVJEC33uYPx1LudGuecs1YMBNMQz21MI5FFc2SFH35lO3MbU5EECX44fg/s400/Resized_Ivory-Door-Studio-Birthday-0026.jpeg" width="266" /></a></div>
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<b>Can you name the biggest lesson you’ve learned or that helped improve the way you work?</b><br />
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Vulnerability is key for me. It’s something I work on daily. The more vulnerable I am, the more in tune I am with myself, others and my work.<br />
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<b>What would you do with 2 more hours a day?</b><br />
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"Same thing I do every day Pinky... try to save the world."<br />
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<b>What is your greatest success, or something you’re most proud of related to what you do?</b><br />
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My annual <a href="https://loveatanystage.com/truth-tuesday-35-reasons-why/">birthday good deed project</a> is something I look forward to every year. Each year I’m amazed at the amount of goodness spread during those three weeks.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjlXkMUWngaLEI2Hw6UwsjnE3WvHpkvohrlsAw05LAn9HuvGLTDa97V3rAt7Ahwwx4AejX6CcaxlKPVVk565XrOvxS0C2R6S-fjck04gNCVXNCgsEhYBBb1X43KlI9T9BVrYIdHK2gBHG3/s1600/Screenshot_20171101-100544.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1344" data-original-width="1080" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjlXkMUWngaLEI2Hw6UwsjnE3WvHpkvohrlsAw05LAn9HuvGLTDa97V3rAt7Ahwwx4AejX6CcaxlKPVVk565XrOvxS0C2R6S-fjck04gNCVXNCgsEhYBBb1X43KlI9T9BVrYIdHK2gBHG3/s400/Screenshot_20171101-100544.jpg" width="321" /></a></div>
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<b>How do you decompress at the end of the work day?</b><br />
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Annoy my husband by acting like I’m 10. I sing, dance, climb things. You know the usual things married women do.<br />
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<b>What’s a fear that keeps you up at night?</b><br />
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A few years ago, I had a job that I was doing well at despite loathing every minute of it. During that time I found out that success scared me more than failure. Some nights when I lie awake I think, what if I got everything I dreamed of, then I freak out.<br />
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<b>What is one thing everyone gets wrong about what you do?</b><br />
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That I’m quiet. I’m VERY talkative. Seriously, I talk too much.<br />
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<b>What does self-care look like in your life?</b><br />
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Right now, it’s listening to podcasts, secret good deeds and a great car concert.<br />
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<b>What helps when you’re stuck? Do you have a motto or quote that inspires/motivates you?</b><br />
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I go back and read old things I’ve written. Most times I’m like DAAAAAMMMNNN I wrote that???<br />
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<b>Are there any women who helped pave the way for your success?</b><br />
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My mother! She’s literally the greatest human ever! She also taught me to be who I am, challenge myself as well as others and not to be defined by labels.<br />
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<b>Lastly, and most important, what is your favorite TV show and what is your favorite snack?</b><br />
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Sheesh, this is the most difficult question. I wouldn’t say that I have a favorite TV show, but <i>Parenthood</i> is one of my all-time favorites. I go through cycles with snacks, but you can’t go wrong with potato chips.<br />
<br /><i>All photos courtesy of Sheena Steward</i><br />
<i><br /></i>P.S. Meet last week's bitch: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/10/an-interview-with-registered-dietitian.html">Registered Dietitian, Erin Hendrickson</a>!<br />
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P.P.S. Full list of My Bitches <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">here</a>.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-72380467152059108132017-10-30T14:36:00.000-05:002017-10-30T14:36:19.048-05:00An Interview with Registered Dietitian Erin Hendrickson<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6DB38i_DTa3y0KNuZscim7s9ENhcV59LgerMfxKW2SliuBT_YhOdakz43XldOh9Rt4U0yS1p_TKKFCbYf5EvJQKUrj3C9Hh9T18ruttesAjPF6BWDev-rDafW1y7ba6zaiH05Q4b_wVjL/s1600/File+Oct+30%252C+2+17+49+PM.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="535" data-original-width="630" height="338" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6DB38i_DTa3y0KNuZscim7s9ENhcV59LgerMfxKW2SliuBT_YhOdakz43XldOh9Rt4U0yS1p_TKKFCbYf5EvJQKUrj3C9Hh9T18ruttesAjPF6BWDev-rDafW1y7ba6zaiH05Q4b_wVjL/s400/File+Oct+30%252C+2+17+49+PM.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>
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I met today's bitch over the summer when we were both asked to host a shopping event for Goodwill. Neither of us had hosted the event before and we arrived early and bonded in the back room trying to organize our racks. I loved everything Erin pulled for the event and her easy-going personality helped calm my nerves.<br />
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If you don't follow Erin on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/theminimalistrd/">Instagram</a>, you should. Most of the things she wears are thrifted, which you would never guess. She also wears a rotating wardrobe and demonstrates how to get a lot of looks out of not a lot of clothes. If you're looking to buy better and buy less, Erin is your girl. Meet today's bitch, the Minimalist RD, Erin Hendrickson!<br />
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<b>What do you do and what is the name of your business?</b><br />
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I am a registered dietitian working with healthcare companies and corporations to promote a culture of health, wellness and sustainability. My side hustle is <a href="https://minimalistrd.com/">Minimalist RD</a> where I talk sustainable food systems, fashion and preach responsible consumerism.<br />
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<b>When did you first learn about this field of work? How did you know it was what you wanted to do?</b><br />
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Things I love: food, the planet and helping people. A few years ago I figured out how to marry the three and I’m just now approaching my ‘zone of genius.’<br />
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<b>What is the best piece of business advice you’ve been given?</b><br />
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Be authentic and live your truth. You can’t fake passion.<br />
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<b>Can you name the biggest lesson you’ve learned or that helped improve the way you work?</b><br />
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If you aren’t happy with a circumstance or situation you’re in, CHANGE IT. Quit your job, move away, break up, take a class, make a new friend. Life’s too short for negativity. Getting outside of your comfort zone will produce the most growth.<br />
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<b>What would you do with 2 more hours a day?</b><br />
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Cook more food from scratch and read more books.<br />
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<b>What has been the biggest sacrifice you’ve made?</b><br />
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I quit my first job out of college after being miserable for years and having no purpose and no back-up plan. I traveled and was literally happier serving food at Chili’s than working in the toxic environment I was previously in. Eventually I landed a job in the health and wellness field and it’s led me on this journey I love.<br />
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<b>What is your greatest success, or something you’re most proud of related to what you do?</b><br />
<br />
I LOVE inspiring individuals to take just one step toward living healthier for themselves and our planet. I recently led a group of volunteers through harvesting produce at an organic urban garden, which was donated to a nonprofit that delivers healthy meals to food deserts around Nashville. THAT is my kind of success.<br />
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<b>Do you have a morning ritual that helps you set the tone for the day?</b><br />
<br />
Coffee + prayer time + taking the dog for a walk = a good morning.<br />
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<b>How do you decompress at night?</b><br />
<br />
I’m not good at turning myself off at night. In a perfect world, I’d cook a fresh dinner, relax with wine and read a book. Instead, it’s weekend leftovers and a few minutes of Netflix, ha!<br />
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<b>What helps when you’re stuck? Do you have a motto or quote that inspires/motivates you?</b><br />
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I’m an advocate of taking a break, whether it’s a quick walk around the neighborhood or a weeklong road trip, to really get my creative juices flowing. When I’m in need of inspiration, I love revisiting Steve Jobs’ story. He said ‘stay hungry, stay foolish’ and that really resonates with me in both business and the things I’m passionate about in life.<br />
<br />
<b>What does self care look like in your life?</b><br />
<br />
My self-care is making sure to create space in the midst of all life’s chaos - space to travel, go on dates with my husband, be physically active and to give back to those less fortunate.<br />
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<b>Are there any women who helped pave the way for your success?</b><br />
<br />
I have several strong, free-spirited women in my family that I absolutely adore and admire. The mentors I turn to most often are those that have shattered cultural norms and are living life on their own terms, while doing so much good in the world!<br />
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<b>Lastly, and most important, what is your favorite TV show and what is your favorite snack?</b><br />
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I don’t have cable and rarely watch TV, but I’ve fallen in love with <i>Chef’s Table, </i>a documentary series on Netflix. Favorite snack: fruit + cheese + nuts!<br />
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<i>All photos courtesy of Erin Hendrickson</i><br />
<i><br /></i>P.S. Meet last week's bitch: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/10/an-interview-with-goodwill-marketing.html">Goodwill Marketing Manager, Niketa Hailey-Hill</a>!<br />
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P.P.S. Full list of My Bitches <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">here</a>.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-72672825800768823992017-10-23T13:57:00.000-05:002017-10-23T13:57:27.392-05:00An Interview with Goodwill Marketing Manager Niketa Hailey-Hill<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Ever since I started getting Reiki, I've gotten super witchy. When I met Niketa earlier this year, I knew we knew each other in a past life. There was no getting to know each other, or slowly building a trust - it was already there. We were either the same dinosaur who became two people, or two dinosaurs who were best friends and reconnected as humans in 2017. (Please know that as I typed this, I made a pterodactyl noise.)<br />
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Recently, I've been able to watch Niketa work and the way she does her job is like nothing I've ever experienced. She is compassionate, thoughtful, and intentional. When you're in her presence, you feel valued. I've never worked for anyone like that and I can only imagine it feels amazing. It's even more amazing to be her friend. Meet today's bitch, my Mesozoic friend, Niketa Hailey-Hill!<br />
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<b>What is your job title and where do you work?</b><br />
<br />
I'm the Marketing Manager for Goodwill Industries of Middle Tennessee, Inc.<br />
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<b>When did you first learn about this field of work? How did you know it was what you wanted to do?</b><br />
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I decided to switch majors to PR and advertising my sophomore year after an English Lit class nearly drove me insane. My best friend was a PR major in college and loved it. I was an English/Education major and didn’t love it. I knew the switch was the right choice when I was asked to create and manage a fundraiser for the local United Way. I loved being a part of an organization that was doing good work and having a positive impact on the community. I still do.<br />
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<b>What is the best piece of business advice you’ve been given?</b><br />
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Invest in and learn about yourself. Having a clear understanding of your personality, strengths, weaknesses, triggers, motivations, beliefs and emotions helps us be at peace, act consciously and be compassionate with ourselves and others.<br />
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<b>Can you name the biggest lesson you’ve learned or that helped improve the way you work?</b><br />
<br />
Relationships matter. Take the time to get to know people and know that everyone has something to teach you.<br />
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<b>What would you do with 2 more hours a day?</b><br />
<br />
Sleep.<br />
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<b>What is your greatest success, or something you’re most proud of related to what you do?</b><br />
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I am proud of my time (2006-2012) serving on the Hands On Nashville board, specifically the year of the flood when I served as the communications chair. The mission of Hands on Nashville is to meet community need through volunteerism. The work we did together as a board and organization that year was especially inspiring, uplifting and important. Being a part of a community coming together to help one another during such a hard time was something I will cherish forever.<br />
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<b>How do you decompress at the end of the work day?</b><br />
<br />
My husband, Adam, and I cook supper together most nights. It’s a stress-reliever and way to catch up about the day.<br />
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<b>What’s a fear that keeps you up at night?</b><br />
<br />
At this time, I do not have any fears that keep me up at night, and, for that, I am extremely grateful.<br />
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<b>What is one thing everyone gets wrong about what you do?</b><br />
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That’s tough. I don’t know that I care to even ponder that. Who can know!?<br />
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<b>What does self care look like in your life?</b><br />
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Morning walks at Shelby Park, listening to music (anything from 70s) or podcasts (love OnBeing, The Moth, and Death, Sex & Money), cooking/baking, dry brushing, lavender anything (hello, Thistle Farms), laughing, sage smudging, GlamGlow masks, and reading Rumi, Pema Chodron or Brene Brown.<br />
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<b>What helps when you’re stuck? Do you have a motto or quote that inspires/motivates you?</b><br />
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The trick is not to get stuck! Acknowledgement of when you are triggered about something is key to understanding yourself better. Instead of giving yourself a hard time about feeling a certain way about someone or something that happened, you simply acknowledge that it is there and take a deeper look. Move closer to it versus fleeing. That’s the hard part! There is something to learn from the moments that inspire you and bring you joy just as there is something to learn from the moments that bring you sadness and anger. It all comes and goes. Both are needed and necessary. I try to remember this daily.<br />
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I do love this Pema Chodron quote: "Gloriousness and wretchedness need each other. One inspires us, the other softens us. They go together.” <i>Start Where You Are: A Guide to Compassionate Living</i> by Pema Chodron.<br />
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<b>Are there any women who helped pave the way for your success?</b><br />
<br />
I feel so fortunate to have several webs of women who have weaved such supportive, nurturing, positive environments around me. In my younger days, I would say that my mother, my Aunt Patty, my grandmother Opal, and my high school yearbook adviser Lana Jackson kept me on track, challenged and encouraged. They are all good, strong, humorous women born and raised in Western Kentucky. I’ve been fortunate to stay friends with a core group of women from high school who I go to for advice, sanity and jokes at any time of the day or night. Our near daily text conversations keep me going some days, and I mean that wholeheartedly. I also have a personal “board of directors” who help guide and support me spiritually, professionally, and mentally. They have no idea that I call them that, but I am pretty sure they know who they are.<br />
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<b>Lastly, and most important, what is your favorite TV show and what is your favorite snack?</b><br />
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It’s hard to name just one favorite TV show! Some of my faves include <i>Catastrophe</i>, <i>Game of Thrones</i> (I love Khaleesi!), <i>Frazier</i>, <i>Call the Midwife</i>, and <i>Finding Your Roots</i>.<br />
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My favorite snack is guacamole and tortilla chips. Lipstick Lounge’s guacamole and honey jalapeno salsa are divine! Yum!<br />
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<i>All photos courtesy of Niketa Hailey-Hill</i><br />
<i><br /></i>P.S. Meet last week's bitch: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/10/an-interview-with-attorney-and-fashion.html">Attorney and Fashion Blogger, Betsy Appleton</a>!<br />
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P.P.S. Full list of My Bitches <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">here</a>.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-7807413728703320032017-10-16T15:01:00.000-05:002017-10-16T15:01:23.724-05:00An Interview with Attorney and Fashion Blogger Betsy Appleton<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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There are a million reasons I'm thrilled to partner with Goodwill on their <a href="http://giveit2goodwill.org/style-meetup/">Style With A Purpose</a> events, like having more reasons to thrift and making people shop a rack of things I pick out. But what I looooove, is getting to know the other bloggers, many of which I've followed on Insta, but never met IRL. Today's bitch is one of these women.<br />
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Betsy wears fancy clothes to a fancy job. And guess where she gets those fancy clothes? Goodwill. If your job requires professional outfits, but you don't want to spend a lot of money on those outfits, Betsy is your girl. Make sure and follow her on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/goldwilldigger/">Instagram</a>, and if you want to meet her in-person and shop a rack of items she picked out, come to our event on October 19! RSVP <a href="http://giveit2goodwill.org/style-meetup/">here</a>. Now, please meet my very sweet new friend, Betsy Appleton!<br />
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<b>What do you do and what is the name of your blog?</b><br />
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I’m an attorney by day and fashion blogger at <a href="http://www.goldwilldigger.com/">Goldwill Digger</a> by night.<br />
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<b>When did you first learn about fashion bloggers? How did you know it was what you wanted to do?</b><br />
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I first stumbled upon fashion bloggers while I was in college, but I really started to discover bloggers and the blogosphere while I was in law school. Following fashion bloggers helped me escape the monotony and stress. The idea of blogging crept into my mind during my last year of law school, but I didn’t have the time or creative energy to put into honing my craft. Also, I struggled to find my niche in the fashion blogger world. I wanted to offer helpful, unique, and informative inspiration to my peers, but I didn’t know what that looked like. I wrestled with what made my style and blog unique for many months before I pulled the trigger on a launch date.<br />
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<b>What is the best piece of advice you’ve been given?</b><br />
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The answer to this question changes as I venture into each new chapter in my life, but one thing that has stuck with me is a quote I heard over 10 years ago, "The purpose of life is to have a life of purpose." I keep this little nugget of wisdom in the back of my mind and constantly remind myself of my purpose.<br />
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<b>Can you name the biggest lesson you’ve learned?</b><br />
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There is only one you. In the blogosphere with hundreds of thousands of bloggers, it’s very easy to get caught playing the comparison game. I have to remind myself that there is only one me, I am unique, and no one else can be me.<br />
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<b>What would you do with 2 more hours a day?</b><br />
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Read more. I really enjoy reading, and I can never find the time to enjoy a good book. When I do find time to read, I fall asleep two or three pages into the chapter.<br />
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<b>What has been the best thrift find you’ve made?</b><br />
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One word. Gucci. Specifically, Tom Ford for Gucci circa 2010. It’s an outrageous fuschia maribou fur stole, and I’m obsessed. I did not technically find this piece because my mom found it, but I am now the proud possessor so I am going to take credit for it. Plus, any time I get the chance to talk about this work of art, I do.<br />
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<b>What is your greatest success, or something you’re most proud of related to your blog?</b><br />
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I have two. One is when I hit publish on my very first post. I look back now and would change a lot of things about my first post, but it was a scary, vulnerable, and important leap to open yourself (and your writing) up to public consumption. Another surreal moment was being included in a Buzzfeed feature on thrift bloggers.<br />
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<b>Do you have a morning ritual that helps you set the tone for the day?</b><br />
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Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. No, but really that’s the only consistent morning ritual I have besides feeding my cat.<br />
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<b>How do you decompress at night?</b><br />
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I have to exercise at some point during the day. I’ve found that to be my most effective form of decompression. Also, I try to turn off everything an hour before bedtime and read until I fall asleep.<br />
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<b>What helps when you’re stuck? Do you have a motto or quote that inspires/motivates you?</b><br />
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When I’m feeling uninspired, which happens often, I love to surround myself with creative and motivated women to remind me why I started in the first place. I also keep myself in check when I get discouraged by looking back to when I first launched <a href="http://www.goldwilldigger.com/">Goldwill Digger</a> and acknowledging and appreciating how far I’ve come and how much I’ve learned about myself.<br />
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<b>What does self care look like in your life?</b><br />
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For me, it’s very important to show my body love by fueling it with healthy, natural, and quality foods. This is a financial and time investment, but it’s a long term investment in my body and my health.<br />
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<b>Are there any women who helped pave the way for your success?</b><br />
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Most definitely my mother. She instilled me with values and drive from the womb. She alway made me feel empowered, confident, and loved. If I wanted to sell puka shell necklaces door to door, she would 100% support me!<br />
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<b>Lastly, and most important, what is your favorite TV show and what is your favorite snack?</b><br />
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Does <i>The Today Show</i> count? I watch it every morning and have since second grade! If calories didn’t count, I would eat Little Debbie’s Christmas tree brownies for every meal the rest of my life. For a healthy snack, my go-to is Trader Joe’s plantain chips with tahini sauce.<br />
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<i>All photos courtesy of Betsy Appleton</i><br />
<i><br /></i>P.S. Meet last week's bitch: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/10/an-interview-with-writer-lucie-brooks.html">Writer, Lucie Witt</a>!<br />
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P.P.S. Full list of My Bitches <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">here</a>.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-55822752244389166982017-10-06T09:47:00.000-05:002017-10-06T09:47:18.903-05:00Thrifting List for Fall<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6mfZlGsilrVL-fAmhrkhomYbHUDPXbrHu_ST63tLzqmhC0QckZPnrTvEN9VfpaOTSi6eTDY02qyUVTnI28WhTQeQMBJ6UhyphenhyphenNVdszHlaCTgVqXWE68e4hi0rgzEp6FDn7e2T3Mk7N7_1jP/s1600/File+Oct+05%252C+1+29+50+PM.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6mfZlGsilrVL-fAmhrkhomYbHUDPXbrHu_ST63tLzqmhC0QckZPnrTvEN9VfpaOTSi6eTDY02qyUVTnI28WhTQeQMBJ6UhyphenhyphenNVdszHlaCTgVqXWE68e4hi0rgzEp6FDn7e2T3Mk7N7_1jP/s400/File+Oct+05%252C+1+29+50+PM.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>
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I love a good To Do list, and after reading the <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/09/september-issues.html">September Issues</a>, I made a To Thrift list. Fall is my season. I love the weather, the colors and the clothes. Unrelated, but I also love Halloween. You, too? Good! Come shop with me on October 19!<br />
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Goodwill is hosting a meet-up called <a href="http://giveit2goodwill.org/style-meetup/">Style with a Purpose</a>. Get personalized advice from a dozen local bloggers and shop merchandise especially selected by the experts (that's me!) to reflect our unique styles (and possible Halloween costumes). We'll share our shopping strategies and help you put outfits together.<br />
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There are a few fall trends I think will be easy to thrift:<br />
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Oversized blazers<br />
Calf-length floral skirts<br />
Ironic tees.<br />
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Here's the thing, some of these trends won't be around next season, and I don't know about you, but if I'm only going to wear something for 3 months, I'm not spending $120 on it. But a $6 oversized blazer from Goodwill? Yes, please. I'll take four.<br />
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Thrifting List for Fall:<br />
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1) mixed patterns<br />
2) animal print (faux fur)<br />
3) floral / silk bomber<br />
4) oversized blazer<br />
5) hard plastic accessories<br />
7) embellished box jacket<br />
8) stacked loafers<br />
9) robes over jeans<br />
10) ironic tees<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">@r29Fahion, @mrspress, @nytimesfashion</span></div>
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First up, mixed patterns. I'm so into this trend, even though I have yet to successfully pull it off. I'm currently on the hunt for patterned pants. There are a bunch that fit the bill, but don't fit my body. The search continues!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">@nytimesfashion, @leandramcohen, @thecut, Michael Kors, Balenciaga, Marni</span></div>
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#DUH. I have in my possession an animal print blazer and a velour animal print robe that looks just like the Michael Kors coat in the bottom left-hand picture. I bought them both from Goodwill and will wear them with the indefatigable swagger of an Instagram influencer.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">@nytimesfashion, Gucci</span></div>
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Silk bomber jackets are all the rage and I'm here for it. I've seen this trend go in a couple of different directions. First, the sexy secretary vibe up top, but also the cool L.A. girl style of <a href="https://www.shoptuesday.com/collections/clothing">Tuesday Bassen</a>. Totally different directions, same trend. I have 2 of the floral jackets, both from Goodwill. The one I'm wearing in this picture up top was just 99 cents!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">@whowhatwear, @whowhatwear, @nytimesfashion, @nytimesfashion, @manrepeller</span></div>
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Oversized blazers! I'm so excited about this trend because I own approximately 20 thrifted blazers. Here's what I've learned. These are a dime a dozen at the thrift stores, so start there and expect to pay $3 - $8. If you want the long, oversized blazer, it needs to already be long. I keep trying to make XXL blazers work and I end up looking like <a href="https://youtu.be/wbVi1UsNhJ8">shrunken-head-Beetlejuice</a>. I've been buying blazers about 1-2 sizes too big, and that works. Also, try mens blazers. They'll probably already be long, plus they won't have shoulder pads.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Chloe, Bally</span></div>
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I'm back on earrings. For the past few years, I've been keeping my earring game low-key, instead focusing on bracelets and necklaces. But I'm obsessed with earrings again. These glossy black and red accessories are everywhere. I found my mouth earrings at <a href="https://www.facebook.com/pretopostmodern/">Pre to Post Modern</a>. The pom pom earrings are from Zara, and the black and white ones are vintage.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">@nytimesfashion, @whowhatwear, @whowhatwear, Stella Luna, @nytimesfashion</span></div>
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I'm into all these weird shoes! I just recently started buying thrift store shoes. First of all, almost all of them have never been worn, and the ones that have I just wipe out with a Lysol wipe. It's fine! I've got silver boots, metallic mules and stacked loafers. I'm still on the lookout for a heeled v-shoe.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Dolce & Gabbana, @whowhatwear, @nytimesfashion</span></div>
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I love boxy embellished jackets. Such a statement piece! And such a thrill to find while thrifting. Some of my thrifted blazers are box-shaped, but they're not embellished. I don't come across these very often, and when I do, I talk myself out of it. "Are you really going to wear a jacket with epaulettes AND fringe?" This year, the answer will be yes.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Fratelli Rossetti</span></div>
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Okay, this is a stretch. I bought these American Eagle stacked loafers at Goodwill for maybe $2. Despite being from 1995, they have never been worn. How do I know they're from 1995? Because I worked at 3 different American Eagle stores from 1994-1999. Shout-out to Hickory Hollow Mall, Cool Springs Galleria, and Stones River Mall! Also, shout-out to malls. RIP.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">@manrepeller, @r29fashion, @blaireadiebee @nytimesfashion, @nytimesfashion, @manrepeller</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">@whowhatwear, @jackswifefreda, @whowhatwear, @whowhatwear, @manrepeller, @manrepeller</span></div>
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I hope to live long enough to be known for something other than wearing robes over jeans, but can any of us really control our legacy? Not if <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Who_Lives,_Who_Dies,_Who_Tells_Your_Story">Alexander Hamilton</a> is to be believed. Now that I own every available thrift store robe in the tri-state area, I'm looking to transition to dresses over jeans. I've been slowly experimenting with it, but haven't gotten the look quite right yet. The good news is, the weirder the dress, the better the outfit. So at least I'm shopping in the right place.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">@nicolettemason, @shopbando, @whowhatwear, @manrepeller, @r29fashion</span></div>
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I love an ironic tee so hard. Finding a tee with the right logo in the right place in the right size is a really triumphant feeling. There are approximately 3 million t-shirts in any Goodwill store, so a bit of 'strategery' (is that joke still funny? were any of you even alive when George W. Bush was President?) is required. I prefer to look in the Men's section. I start with white tees in size L. I don't look in every color and I cap my search at 10 minutes.<br />
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Get a head start on your To Thrift list by shopping my curated rack at Goodwill on October 19! If you know you're coming, <a href="http://giveit2goodwill.org/style-meetup/">RSVP</a>. Having a headcount helps know how many drinks and snacks to buy. I did mention there will be drinks and snacks, right? See you on October 19!<br />
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<i>All photos sources are @ Instagram</i><br />
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P.S. Shopping tips for <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/07/how-to-create-street-style-look-on.html">creating a street style look on a budget</a>!<br />
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P.P.S. For more fall inspiration, read my <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/09/september-issues.html">September Issues</a> report.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-2420940555071268542017-10-04T15:04:00.000-05:002017-10-04T16:51:54.246-05:00An Interview with Writer Lucie Witt<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Welcome to another installment of These My Nominated Bitches! Today's bitch was nominated by my friend, and fellow bitch, <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2016/04/an-interview-with-community-engagement.html">Katie Stone</a>. Take it away, Katie!<br />
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When I first met Lucie in law school, I knew I HAD to be friends with the big-mouthed liberal who regularly dropped colorful F-bombs with her soft spoken voice. I'm still not sure why she asked me to be in her study group, but we instantly became best friends. We both hate being lawyers and love to drink coffee and write essays and fiction (she is infinitely more experienced and talented than I am), and we've known each other through heartbreak, trauma, pregnancy and babies, and countless cups of coffee. It's hard to even put into words how badass Lucie is, so I'll just say this: I am thankful every single day that the universe led to me my person (our poor husbands live in fear that we'll ditch them to raise our babies together in a commune in the woods... and they probably aren't being paranoid). Meet my favorite bitch, Lucie! -- Katie<br />
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<b>What is your job title and where do you work?</b><br />
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I have multiple jobs: attorney, adjunct professor (on special topics related to gender and the law), and writer (those are not listed in order of preference). I’ll focus on the one I love the most: writer. My fiction work is represented by literary agent extraordinaire, Caitie Flum of Liza Dawson Associates. My nonfiction work is published in Catapult and Bust.<br />
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<b>When did you first learn about this field of work? How did you know it was what you wanted to do?</b><br />
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Being a writer and pursuing a career as a published writer are two wildly different things. I’ve been a writer as long as I can remember. Pursuing a career as a published writer came much later in life.<br />
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I grew up an avid reader, and on at least some level, I knew actual humans wrote the stories I consumed. As a child I wrote knockoffs of my favorite books (hey, <i>Sweet Valley Twins</i>). In high school I wrote a lot of bad poetry, and as an undergrad I played around with some short stories and the beginnings of a few novels. It took a long time – until I was 26 – before I started considering being a published writer as a thing I could actually do. I grew up in a low-income family where having a practical job (whether it was bartending or working a 9-5) took precedence. As far as I knew being a writer or an artist was something for trust fund kids, not someone who had student loans and came from generational poverty. At some point I realized I could do both, and I kept writing books until I found one that landed me my literary agent in 2016, about six years after I finished my first novel and started researching publishing.<br />
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But I still have a day job. And a night job.<br />
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<b>What is the best piece of business advice you’ve been given?</b><br />
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Persevere. It’s the single most important trait I can think of in writing and publishing. Finish the project you’re working on, and if it doesn’t sell, start on the next.<br />
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<b>Can you name the biggest lesson you’ve learned or that helped improve the way you work?</b><br />
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Persevere, but give yourself some grace. I am not one of those writers who beats myself up if I don’t write every day. My day job gets busy, I teach a new course, and my kids have a week with school events and practices and tough homework (I have four kids, which makes things hectic more often than not). Sometimes the writing just doesn’t happen for days or even weeks (occasionally months). That used to really stress me out, and when I would finally sit down to write again, that built up stress deteriorated my writing process. Now I accept the breaks as part of my reality. I don’t bring the same baggage to my writing time, and I use the down time I’m not writing to let my ideas breathe and gain new insight on whatever project I’m currently working on. When I do come back it’s with fresh eyes and a clear head.<br />
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<b>What would you do with 2 more hours a day?</b><br />
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I should say write.<br />
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I would honestly probably sleep more. I usually sleep 5-6 hours a night and I know that’s not enough.<br />
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<b>What is your greatest success, or something you’re most proud of related to what you do?</b><br />
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I feel most successful as a writer when someone tells me my words changed the way they felt or thought about something in the world, that my writing made them feel seen, or that I made them cry (insert evil writer laugh).<br />
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I am most proud of my ability to ruthlessly revise and start over when needed.<br />
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<b>How do you decompress at the end of the work day?</b><br />
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I’m not great at decompressing – that’s something I really need to work on. I usually go, go, go until I crash. When I am intentional about decompressing, I’ll take a walk (I’m trying to get back into running, but can’t claim that just yet) and read before bed.<br />
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Or I spend too much time scrolling through Facebook and Twitter, which is technically decompressing but isn’t great for my mental state.<br />
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<b>What’s a fear that keeps you up at night?</b><br />
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I deal with anxiety issues so there is no singular fear – it’s more a constant loop of fears playing over in my head. The current presidential administration does something horrifying daily (or multiple times a day). I have Black children and a Black husband in an anti-Black country. I have crushing student loan debt. Nuclear War. Climate change.<br />
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Writing specific fears are also numerous. My book will never sell. My book will sell, and it will tank. Everyone will hate my books. I’ll mess up a character in one of my books and cause harm to a reader that character is supposed to represent. And on and on …<br />
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<b>What is one thing everyone gets wrong about what you do?</b><br />
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That having an idea for a book is the same thing as writing a book.<br />
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<b>What does self care look like in your life?</b><br />
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Self-care is carving out intentional time for myself and saying no to things: making time for nurturing friendships with the women in my life, for hiking and walks, for reading books, and saying no to awesome things I would love to do because there simply aren’t enough hours in the day.<br />
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Disengaging with social media, and, for set periods of time (have to stay informed long-term), the news is also critical.<br />
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<b>What helps when you’re stuck? Do you have a motto or quote that inspires/motivates you?</b><br />
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When I’m really stuck I’ll usually organize or clean something around the house. Whatever I was trying to sort out will usually come to me if I give it a little space.<br />
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I also try to remember that I’ve hit the wall before, and I always find a way over.<br />
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<b>Are there any women who helped pave the way for your success?</b><br />
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There are honestly too many to name but I’ll try.<br />
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Almost all the people who have read my books and offered critique over the years, helping me grow as a writer, are women. Another writer friend has been absolutely critical in helping me develop my craft as a nonfiction writer and generous with her time and feedback. The first editor to ever accept one of my essay pitches and help me turn the seed of an idea into something fully developed was a woman.<br />
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A lot of people aren’t familiar with how literary agents work, but essentially they agree to represent your work and they pitch your book to editors at publishing houses. When the book sells, they take a commission. That means they can spend years working on your behalf before they see a cent. I’m endlessly grateful my literary agent, Caitie Flum, saw something in my writing worth taking that risk on, and she is a tireless advocate on behalf of my writing (also cool – she works at a literary agency founded by a woman, that employees all women agents).<br />
<br />
Reading the works of other women writers, especially Black women, has been instrumental to developing my world view, my critical thinking, and helping me see things from a perspective beyond my own. My writing would be considerably lesser if it wasn’t for their example and influence.<br />
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<b>Lastly, and most important, what is your favorite TV show and what is your favorite snack?</b><br />
<br />
This is hard because my favorite shows shift – I get extremely addicted to certain shows and then I move on. I’m currently obsessed with <i>Game of Thrones</i> and NEED to know how it will end (2019? Really?). Season two of <i>Master of None</i> really did live up to the hype. Long term favorites that I’ll watch again and again – <i>Gilmore Girls</i> and <i>Veronica Mars</i>. I’m also currently loving <i>Insecure</i> and need to know when <i>Atlanta</i> is coming back for Season two.<br />
<br />
I’m addicted to salt and vinegar chips and most sweets (honestly, I’m not even that picky). And while it’s not a snack, lattes are basically my favorite thing on earth (sorry, husband and kids).<br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>All photos courtesy of Lucie Witt</i><br />
<i><br /></i>P.S. Meet last week's bitch: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/09/an-interview-with-senior-creative.html">Senior Creative Services Manager, Amy Nathanson</a>!<br />
<br />
P.P.S. Full list of My Bitches <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">here</a>.</div>
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The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-23394376687521201562017-09-25T14:59:00.000-05:002017-09-25T14:59:32.473-05:00An Interview with Senior Creative Services Manager Amy Nathanson<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4bnSIezp9nPAy4vgTR8TqXOF2CH85cZGkoR3LDoXvTbCiFYW6w7N9HajgK5UHSJ_5Z2Gw5ji8obvzAKIg1YGki-L4ilUioPbzQVzgXv6a1_Gly5VRSL3Um84Gdl7_qFzR80bpM81A4g1p/s1600/TMB+Amy.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4bnSIezp9nPAy4vgTR8TqXOF2CH85cZGkoR3LDoXvTbCiFYW6w7N9HajgK5UHSJ_5Z2Gw5ji8obvzAKIg1YGki-L4ilUioPbzQVzgXv6a1_Gly5VRSL3Um84Gdl7_qFzR80bpM81A4g1p/s400/TMB+Amy.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>
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If a confetti cannon came to life, it would be less fun than Amy Nathanson. Here is a list of things Amy owns: neon cactus, crocheted mermaid tail, mounted plush flamingo head, and every animal-shaped Kate Spade bag, including the piñata one. We went out for drinks once and she took me to a daiquiri factory with a self-serve candy bar. Did you know this existed? I didn't.<br />
<br />
I met Amy through our shared <strike>friend</strike> bitch, <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2016/02/an-interview-with-dmc-operations.html">Rita Davidson</a>, and I'm convinced that when the two of them are alone under the cover of the full moon, they turn into flamingos. Do you know anyone who can get an NHL mascot to come to their birthday party? I do, and she's today's bitch. Meet Amy Nathanson!<br />
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<br />
<b>What is your job title and where do you work?</b><br />
<br />
I am the Senior Creative Services Manager at <a href="http://www.destinationnashville.com/">Destination Nashville</a> and I have been with the company for almost 3.5 years. We are an all-female Destination Management Company that works with meetings and conventions that come to Nashville. We help them create, plan, and produce themed events, dinners, entertainment, tours, and transportation. Do you need live reindeer? Five 16-foot tall guitars? A Jane Lynch drag queen? I know a guy…<br />
<br />
<b>When did you first learn about this field of work? How did you know it was what you wanted to do?</b><br />
<br />
I’ve been in the wedding and events industry for more than 10 years. In the past, I worked for several florists and a linen company, so basically everything that decorates a table. When I worked with flowers and linens, I was sales/creative/operations combined. Creating a vision with brides and setting up weddings was fun and fast-paced, but absolutely exhausting (like, my body actually hurt) with a poor work-life balance. My first day on the job at the linen company, I made a sales call to Destination Nashville. The minute I walked into their office, learned about what they did, and saw how they worked with one another, I was hooked. From that moment on, I was willing to do whatever it took to work for them! Eight months later, I was hired.<br />
<br />
<b>What is the best piece of business advice you’ve been given?</b><br />
<br />
We’re not doctors and we’re not saving lives. It’s easy to get caught up in the highs and lows of this business—winning accounts, losing accounts, letting yourself get offended if someone doesn’t like your designs, etc. At the end of the day, and even though I absolutely adore what I do, I plan parties. I try to put it into perspective with the rest of the world and remember that what I get to do every day is pretty damn cool and makes a lot of people smile.<br />
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<br />
<b>Can you name the biggest lesson you’ve learned or that helped improve the way you work?</b><br />
<br />
To me, you’re really not going to be able to do the best job you possibly can until you have drunk (grammar check—oh Lord) the Kool Aid. Look for a job that physically makes you want to give 150% every day. Self-motivation is super important to me. Take ownership of your job and act like you own the company. If you’re not there yet, fake it ‘til you make it, honey.<br />
<br />
<b>What would you do with 2 more hours a day?</b><br />
<br />
This is really funny because I was just thinking about this the other day. I totally want to take up things that I would have cried over, had my parents pushed me to do them when I was a kid. I want to learn French. I want to learn how to play the piano. I want to make all of the weird yarn crafts and dips I’ve saved on Pinterest. I’d probably also take a bunch of bizarre webinars and get certified to do questionable things.<br />
<br />
<b>What is your greatest success, or something you’re most proud of related to what you do?</b><br />
<br />
Graduating college—hands down. Took me a while to find something that I really loved, and when I found Art History, I dug my claws in hard.<br />
<br />
I hear you laughing about that Art History degree, but I actually got to use it this year at Destination Nashville. I took a favorite Rococo painting of mine (Fragonard’s “The Swing”) and designed an entire party around it—I wanted to go to there (thanks, Liz Lemon).<br />
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<br />
<b>How do you decompress at the end of the work day?</b><br />
<br />
I bake cakes! And pies and cookies and bread and bars... Something about measuring and stirring and frosting really calms my ass down. It teaches me patience on a level that I can understand and follow. The results are almost always amazing (tooting my own damn horn) and I get joy out of sharing them with people I love.<br />
<br />
<b>What’s a fear that keeps you up at night?</b><br />
<br />
I’m single, I’m a homeowner, a new car owner, a cat mom, and a Kate Spade-addict with an active social life. I proudly juggle all of these things on my own and pray that they don’t come crashing down. I’m very happy to have made an awesome life for myself, but I just worry that it could all go “poof” at any moment.<br />
<br />
<b>What is one thing everyone gets wrong about what you do?</b><br />
<br />
I am not a wedding planner! I have paid my dues in the wedding industry and dealt with my fair share of crying brides and rude mothers. It taught me a lot, and I have a lot of friends that do this for a living that I respect VERY much, but I’ll never go back. I don’t do rose petals, I don’t do shoe decals, I don’t do upside down cakes that hang from the ceiling.<br />
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<br />
<b>What does self-care look like in your life?</b><br />
<br />
Self-care is watching <i>Pioneer Woman</i> in bed on a Sunday. Self-care is time for a manicure, it’s meal-planning, sometimes saying “no” to hanging out, Epsom salt baths, and lots and lots and LOTS of music.<br />
<br />
<b>What helps when you’re stuck? Do you have a motto or quote that inspires/motivates you?</b><br />
<br />
There is an <a href="https://www.etsy.com/shop/ohmydeer">Oh My Deer</a> print from Porter Flea that hangs above my desk that says, “<a href="https://www.etsy.com/listing/130874610/8x10-print-be-a-nice-human?ref=shop_home_active_10">Be a Nice Human</a>.” I love that and I love pointing to it when other people visit my desk and need to read it. You can be strong, intelligent, creative, and command attention and respect and STILL be a nice human being.<br />
<br />
<b>Are there any women who helped pave the way for your success?</b><br />
<br />
Pretty sure there has only ever been one creative person in my entire family—my paternal grandma. She and my grandpa babysat me a lot when I was little and they would take me to museums, public gardens, great movies, cooking classes, plays, and we ate LOTS of desserts. She cooked and baked with me, made clay animals with me, taught me how to sew, how to read, explore, and garden. She loved gold lame, sequins, sparkles, big necklaces, and big sunglasses. She was smart as a whip, insanely funny, and so incredibly kind. I am proud to take after her and I think that I got all of my best qualities from her.<br />
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<br />
<b>Lastly, and most important, what is your favorite TV show and what is your favorite snack?</b><br />
<br />
My favorite TV show is either <i>Law & Order: SVU</i>, <i>Pioneer Woman</i>, or <i>F*ck That’s Delicious</i> (on Viceland). Favorite snack would have to be a cheese plate. I can make one virtually anywhere out of anything—it’s a gift.<br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>All photos courtesy of Amy Nathanson</i><br />
<i><br /></i>P.S. Meet last week's bitch: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/09/an-interview-with-founder-of-campaign.html">Founder of Campaign Greenhouse, Kathryn Poindexter</a>!<br />
<br />
P.P.S. Full list of My Bitches <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">here</a>.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-82228692782857105222017-09-18T11:25:00.000-05:002017-09-18T11:25:27.534-05:00An Interview with the Founder of Campaign Greenhouse, Kathryn Poindexter<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
One of the downsides to being politics-adjacent in Tennessee is having to maintain relationships with people who either support policies or candidates that you are spiritually, emotionally, and physically opposed to. But the upside is knowing the people behind the scenes. The people busting their humps to get better candidates on the ballot, and ultimately in office. It should come as no surprise that a lot of these people are women. And one such woman is today's bitch.<br />
<br />
Kathryn and I were introduced via a mutual friend who, rightfully, knew that we would hit it off. We met at a conference and left 8 hours later with the determination that we were, in fact, sisters from another mister. It is an offense to the female friendship gods that we do not live in the same state. Take your time reading this one. There's a lot of gold sprinkled in these long answers. Meet today's bitch, Kathryn Poindexter!<br />
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<br />
<b>What is your job title and where do you work?</b><br />
<br />
I’m the Founder of <a href="http://www.campaigngreenhouse.com/">Campaign Greenhouse</a> – campaign management tools and coaching for new candidates and races with small budgets.<br />
<br />
<b>When did you first learn about this field of work? How did you know it was what you wanted to do?</b><br />
<br />
I got a job after college running a door-to-door fundraising canvass for the state PIRGs. I had no idea what I wanted to do besides that I wanted to make a difference, and I wanted to be in charge. Having some autonomy and ownership that early in my career was super attractive to me, and the people were great. I stayed with the organization for 6 years and built a network of relationships that continues to be one of the most valuable assets I have.<br />
<br />
<b>What is the best piece of business advice you’ve been given?</b><br />
<br />
Know when to throw money at a problem. Money can solve a host of problems, and it’s often the easiest solution. It’s easy to operate from a scarcity mindset, and I was extremely budget conscious for awhile. But being penny-wise means you can miss opportunities to make great financial decisions by spending a little money up front. Finding the right balance is a lifelong lesson.<br />
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<br />
<b>Can you name the biggest lesson you’ve learned or that helped improve the way you work?</b><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it</li>
<li>Don’t borrow trouble</li>
</ul>
<br />
In other words, doing the right work at the right time. In my day-to-day life, this means adopting a prioritization strategy where I build things when we need them now, but with an eye to the long-term so we don’t have to build them again. I learned this as a consultant – when a client asked for something, if I could answer their question in a way that created a resource I could use for other clients in the future, it felt like a better use of my time. For example, if someone asks how much something costs, instead of just answering them, why not spend a teeny bit of extra time making a price sheet?<br />
<br />
As with all things, it’s a balance. On one end of the teeter totter, you can get caught unprepared and have to scramble or produce inferior work. On the other end of the teeter totter, you can spend a bunch of time planning or producing stuff you’re never going to need, or that you have to re-do later anyway. The sweet spot is surfing somewhere between the two.<br />
<br />
<b>What would you do with 2 more hours a day?</b><br />
<br />
Sleep! I just got diagnosed with narcolepsy, a disorder that means my brain handles sleep cycles differently. I need more sleep than neurotypical people do. I need it more frequently, and I have less control over where and when I fall asleep. It’s a disorder I’ve had since middle school, but am just now figuring out. Getting the diagnosis has been pretty cool – it’s explained a bunch of stuff and given me permission to try some new coping strategies, like getting a lot more sleep, building naps into my schedule more aggressively, and letting myself drink as much coffee as I want. But the answer is still always sleep.<br />
<br />
<b>What is your greatest success, or something you’re most proud of related to what you do?</b><br />
<br />
As of this moment, Campaign Greenhouse is a core team of 8 people, an outer ring team of almost 100, we have candidates in 8 states, and we have our first win under our belts. I’m both unsurprised and incredibly proud that we have made it this far. We are trying to solve a host of big civic problems all at once in a fairly complicated and revolutionary way, and it’s starting to take off!<br />
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But I’ve been working on this since 2013, when I started it by myself, did lots of planning, and ran out of time, money, and emotional ability to hear no. There are still plenty of days that I bang my head against a wall and berate myself for not finding some nice boring job – but the fact that I’ve been able to push through the loneliness and doubt, highs and lows of expectation, disappointment and cash flow, and still show up at work every day, is a real accomplishment. (There are definitely days when I just can’t show up and I let myself have those too.)<br />
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And it’s super important that I remember to be proud of myself fairly regularly. I spend plenty of time in rooms full of men who feel more comfortable than I do taking credit for success, and my ability to appear capable, accomplished and successful next to them has real implications for my ability to make the deals I need to be successful. It’s a vicious cycle and I try to stay on the sunny side of that loop.<br />
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<b>How do you decompress at the end of the work day?</b><br />
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Sleep is probably the answer to this question too. My other priority besides work is relationships – I try to spend enough time with my large and lovely chosen family, especially real downtime where we don’t have to be anywhere and we can just talk and laugh. Being outside is real medicine for me and I am actively trying to spend more time outside.<br />
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<b>What’s a fear that keeps you up at night?</b><br />
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Can’t answer this because then I would have to think about my fears. I have spent many years building coping tools I need to handle fear – the most paralyzing force in the universe. I count primarily on compartmentalization – my fears live in a file room, each in a locked (and neatly labeled) drawer. They’re always accessible, but I don’t have to interact with them until one of them starts to rattle its drawer and then I deal with it in a therapy session. I started EFT tapping with a therapist about 3 years ago, and it been a monumental tool to add to my life. My close friends have remarked at how much growth they have seen in me since then. It’s a little weird, but it’s worth checking out.<br />
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<b>What is one thing everyone gets wrong about what you do?</b><br />
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Strangers often think because I work in politics, I want to discuss politics. Nope! It’s still one of those off-limits topics, along with money and religion (and I’ll add in food and child-rearing). I usually respond with a big smile and say, “Well, if I answered that question I’d be legally required to charge you $250 an hour!” It’s not quite true, but it conveys the message effectively.<br />
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<b>What does self care look like in your life?</b><br />
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I’ve been looking for the keys to self-care for awhile – the one or two power pieces that when in place, make everything else feel easier. I think I’ve identified one – a clean house. When my apartment is in order I’m more relaxed, I’m getting more sleep, I’m more likely to work out and eat something healthy and feel generally better about life. So I’ve started throwing money at that problem – in addition to a house cleaner, I send out my laundry and I hired an organizer to help me de-clutter and create places for everything. It feels like a life hack, like I’m cheating the system. It’s delightful and it makes me happy and sometimes I just giggle when I think about it. It’s also an easy first expense to give up, which gives me some needed flexibility in my budget.<br />
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<b>What helps when you’re stuck? Do you have a motto or quote that inspires/motivates you?</b><br />
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Audre Lorde said, “When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid.” The idea that fear is irrelevant is really freeing. It doesn’t actually matter if I’m afraid; it’s a totally normal part of both life and business, and it’s not a piece of information that I need to factor into decision-making. It means I don’t have to worry about figuring out how to NOT be afraid – that seems much harder. There’s room for the fear to stay, but it doesn’t have any power.<br />
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<b>Are there any women who helped pave the way for your success?</b><br />
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So, so many. I feel quite closely connected to a huge cohort of women in my industry. I visualize us tightly linked at the elbows and moving forward together. Without the email groups and social media support and happy hours and hugs and tears and “that’s effed up” and “I see you, girl,” I can guarantee I would not be where I am. I would have been unable to get out of bed at least half the time. Then there are the business deals that come with that huge cohort, I’ve done pretty well prioritizing connections with women in an industry full of men. There are the almost exclusively women of color who do the invisible work to support my life – the amazing concierge at my apartment building, the people who do my laundry, the team who cleans my house. And Greenhouse specifically is built on this amazing group of highly accomplished women who have individually said, “I want to help” and are each doing pieces of the work that has to get done. One friend of mine is doing scheduling for me while she’s on parental leave from her job. It’s been a really critical resource.<br />
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<b>Lastly, and most important, what is your favorite TV show and what is your favorite snack?</b><br />
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I’m so behind on TV. I am waiting for <i>Grey’s Anatomy</i> to come back; it’s an old favorite and I always make time for it. I also really like the Mireille Enos Peter Krause show that’s happening. <i>Homeland</i>, in spurts, when I can handle the stress.<br />
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Favorite snack. I want to say nuts or avocado but I have to be real and say just cheese, always cheese, forever cheese.<br />
<br /><i>All photos courtesy of Kathryn Poindexter</i><br />
<i><br /></i>P.S. Meet last week's bitch: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/08/an-interview-with-fashion-blogger.html">Fashion Blogger, Porsche Pope</a>!<br />
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P.P.S. Full list of My Bitches <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">here</a>.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-70335086349236251322017-09-06T14:48:00.000-05:002017-09-06T14:48:33.161-05:00September Issues<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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There is a day, every August, I awake with the memory of pumpkin spice on my tongue and the imagined feel of a thick, wool scarf around my neck, like a phantom sartorial limb, and I know it's time. It is time to buy the magazines.<br />
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I moved to New York City after college and worked for Gloria Vanderbilt's home furnishings company. My boss came from the fashion world, so my job every morning was to go through <i>Women's Wear Daily</i> and the trade magazines and pull trends. The things I pulled went directly onto the mood boards that hung above the collections. My point? I'm good at magazines.<br />
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My take-aways from the fall '17 magazines? Animal print, duh, but luxe animal print. Think velvet, velour, and faux fur. The Formation / military jacket is back, but with more bedazzling and a boxier silhouette. Bright, bold florals on top of more bold, bright florals, but with black (!!). Think more <i>Heathers</i> and less Kate Spade.<br />
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Wow, Vogue looks good to be 125 years old. Weighing in at 775 pages, this behemoth will set you back $9.99. Is it worth it? Yes. Plus, you can finally be in on all the Twitter jokes about how the liberal elites co-opted the Statue of Liberty.<br />
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This is just a page advertising Vogue's 125th anniversary edition, but I love this mix of colors and patterns. If I had a mood board, I'd put this on it.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Dolce & Gabbana, Michael Kors, Etro, Marni</span></div>
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Animal print!<br />
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"Ha-ha," they said when I bought a <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/06/friday-links_9.html">velour animal print robe</a> to wear as a jacket. Well, dear Instagram follower, who's laughing now?<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Gucci, J. Crew</span></div>
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I'm glad to see the return of the floral bomber jacket because I bought two last year, both from Goodwill, natch. I don't do sexy secretary, but I'm intrigued by this double floral, as opposed to how I usually wear mine - with an ironic tee and ripped boyfriend jeans.<br />
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I feel ridiculous every time I tie a bandana around my neck, but I refuse to quit trying to pull this look off. Thanks for the validation, J. Crew.<br />
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I pulled the most from this magazine, so if you only want to spend $5.99, buy Elle. It has 500 pages, so still a lot of bang for your buck. I have no idea who this is on the cover though.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Ralph Lauren, Missoni</span></div>
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For those of you just waking up from a coma, or not on Instagram, oversized blazers are big (heh) for fall. But don't buy a designer one. Go get one for $6 from Goodwill. I pulled these pictures because I've recently bought blazers in both of these patterns. And I just got them back from the dry cleaners, so watch out!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Chloe, Bally</span></div>
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Okay, two things. One, I love a purse in an interesting shape, even though most of them don't hold my <strike>iPad Mini</strike> phone. Where my 6sPlus users at? Two, I'm into these glossy black and red embellishments. Hot tip: there are $12 earring and pin versions of these at Pre To Post Modern. I bought the mouth earrings because they remind me of <i>Rocky Horror Picture Show</i>.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Stella Luna, Loeffler Randall, Vans, Nike Air Jordan III, Dr. Martens</span></div>
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Those of you old enough to have had to wear stilettos until <i>SATC</i> went off the air will rejoice with me at the resurgence of tennis shoes as fashion. I have checkerboard Vans, but I want some hightop Airwalks and OG Doc Martens. I'm also super into these v-shaped shoes everyone is wearing.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Loewe, Michael Kors Collection</span></div>
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In 2005, John and I were still early enough in our relationship to do couples Halloween costumes. John was an astronaut and I was his alien bride, which was presumptuous because we had barely been dating a year. I digress. My costume was a silver lame dress (that I still have). So, two things: I am relationship psychic and fashion psychic. Take note.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Junya Watanabe Comme Des Garcons, Libertine</span></div>
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This picture on the left is probably my favorite outfit in all three magazines. So this is a faux-fur animal print coat over a hoodie, over leather pants. I can't even. If I die this season, bury me in this.<br />
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I had a pair of giraffe print pants in college that I TREASURED. They were from the Victoria's Secret catalogue, circa 1996. These $1,000 Libertine pants remind me of them, and of the Sigma Chi formal in Atlanta I wore them to.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJM5Hd4K591CFXmdn9HscZdpTiygivOAb0jACHKwl4uajF5o4h420rM41DsYtUSKjg9lW42Nz75MXcB2xIbzjfeebKaISghdA6y8Z6pgdW1qo3BV5pCGVp5LeFXLrDtblp5cSGVttfCIpi/s1600/IMG_8150.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJM5Hd4K591CFXmdn9HscZdpTiygivOAb0jACHKwl4uajF5o4h420rM41DsYtUSKjg9lW42Nz75MXcB2xIbzjfeebKaISghdA6y8Z6pgdW1qo3BV5pCGVp5LeFXLrDtblp5cSGVttfCIpi/s400/IMG_8150.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Dolce & Gabbana, Gucci</span></div>
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I love all of this. It's hard to tell, but the shoes in the left are animal print patent leather oxfords! I swear to God, I will be haunted to the day I die by the things I don't buy in thrift stores. Years ago, I found an embellished, box, denim jacket with shoulder pads, fringe and huge gold buttons and I didn't buy it. Why aren't there time machines yet?! P.S. These mid-length tweed skirts are a dime a dozen at the thrift stores and I love them punked out like this with a hoodie, moto jacket and combat boots.<br />
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I like Marie Claire. They have a good mix of fashion, think pieces, and book reviews. There's a lot in this magazine, I had just already flagged most of it. For only $4.99, it's worth buying.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Chanel</span></div>
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Obviously, none of us are buying Chanel, but, I found a thrifted version of this exact skirt at Goodwill recently. I had it on my rack at the September Sip, Style, and Shop event. Someone bought it. If it was you, tag me in a picture! I like these pleated skirts and I'm glad the trend isn't over yet.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Michael Kors Collection, Balenciaga, Jeremy Scott</span></div>
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Oh hello, more textured animal print. Is this the year I finally buy faux-fur? Can I pull off an eye patch? It's designer...<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Pierre Hardy, Fratelli Rossetti</span></div>
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You guys, I'm going to go balls to the wall in silver lame this season. Just you wait. I love those silver stacked heel boot-shoes. I pulled the other page because there's another mid-length pleated skirt, and because I like those thick soled loafers with the buckle and tassel.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Gucci</span></div>
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Can you tell I love this jacket? I also love this zip-up, sweater jacket. I'm really into a bright floral on a black background. Thrifted version of this, I will find you!<br />
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P.S. Want more? Check out my <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2016/09/september-issues.html">September Issues</a> post from 2016!<br />
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P.P.S. I'm sharing tips on creating a street style look on a budget <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/07/how-to-create-street-style-look-on.html">here</a>.The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-2591547244264261132017-08-28T11:29:00.000-05:002017-08-28T11:29:31.207-05:00An Interview with Fashion Blogger Porsche Pope<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWNOKxZJY1iZYscGb1oZZhpicZz72dyoX42zb2riTttTlIZsP3fQk_21jf0aCiJVCUckovDewe5dxNZcE9dv1-4ScIsq9s4kOCW0DXg-96uVk9GFCpGv-IPsywaDiPTO9ynpy78IpkbgxB/s1600/TMB+Porsche.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="683" data-original-width="1024" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWNOKxZJY1iZYscGb1oZZhpicZz72dyoX42zb2riTttTlIZsP3fQk_21jf0aCiJVCUckovDewe5dxNZcE9dv1-4ScIsq9s4kOCW0DXg-96uVk9GFCpGv-IPsywaDiPTO9ynpy78IpkbgxB/s400/TMB+Porsche.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>
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If you're anti nice people who take gorgeous photos, move along. Everyone else, meet your new best Instagram friend! You know I'm a champion of women who give up the 9-to-5 and strike out on their own, and today's bitch did just that. Oh, and did I mention she has a husband, two kids and two dogs? Yeah.<br />
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I've been following Porsche online for awhile, admiring her love of a bold print and a bold lip. A woman after my own heart. I finally had the opportunity to meet her when we hosted a shopping event for Goodwill. Easily, seventy percent of the people who showed up were for Porsche. Her following is legit. All the friends I made that night were friends of Porsche's. If you're a working woman getting back into the professional field on a budget, Porsche is who you want to <a href="https://www.instagram.com/polishedpope/">follow</a>. Meet today's bitch, Porsche Pope!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHuJold1KEgVz1BMxBNPZmvjXgdC0Hlw-KVUfg1GdALHk5MpSGKIWa6Xjpxf14Smr6NYXVt5-xk3LuwpNEFDb_xWLZ-J3DpWdyNNrAXdhfCAU7RrHmj-QAq78EeJr_pNKySY9iBkwGp8v_/s1600/IMG_0182.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="683" data-original-width="1024" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHuJold1KEgVz1BMxBNPZmvjXgdC0Hlw-KVUfg1GdALHk5MpSGKIWa6Xjpxf14Smr6NYXVt5-xk3LuwpNEFDb_xWLZ-J3DpWdyNNrAXdhfCAU7RrHmj-QAq78EeJr_pNKySY9iBkwGp8v_/s400/IMG_0182.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<b>What do you do and what is the name of your business?</b><br />
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I am a fashion blogger, personal shopper, and designer. The name of my business / brand is <a href="https://www.polishedpope.com/">Polished Pope, Inc.</a><br />
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<b>When did you first learn about this field of work? How did you know it was what you wanted to do?</b><br />
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I have been fascinated with design and fashion since I was a little girl. I went to college and studied Interior Design. I have always known that I wanted to become a well known designer, but just recently within the last few years I tapped into fashion. I introduced my blog to the world this past December and it has been so great developing this entity of my brand.<br />
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<b>What is the best piece of business advice you’ve been given?</b><br />
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Stay in your lane, try not to compare yourself or your business to anyone else, and be patient with yourself.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGRO4c_uKImTRlIwzo_7x7EAVCk5Kx6DzzOSI5uAnMsTdqWRaXTGhidqBGa0mjzpWcAJnJkkDcwlUL6ilGbO6AB3wixSFXFcEwX64YCxEqaUMCrYnFR8zCGhZ2bMuTiNhRURNXxAfgWvN2/s1600/IMG_0203.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="683" data-original-width="1024" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGRO4c_uKImTRlIwzo_7x7EAVCk5Kx6DzzOSI5uAnMsTdqWRaXTGhidqBGa0mjzpWcAJnJkkDcwlUL6ilGbO6AB3wixSFXFcEwX64YCxEqaUMCrYnFR8zCGhZ2bMuTiNhRURNXxAfgWvN2/s400/IMG_0203.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<b>Can you name the biggest lesson you’ve learned or that helped improve the way you work?</b><br />
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Persistence is key, work off of momentum. Just having a meaningful goal is not enough. To make a difference, you must continuously take action. Work daily towards achieving your goals. Persistence is necessary, as meaningful goals don’t come easy.<br />
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<b>What would you do with 2 more hours a day?</b><br />
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This may sound cheesy, but I would dive into a book. I have so many books that I haven’t read and more books that I want to read. I do not care for the idea of audiobooks because I'm stubborn. I want to flip through the pages and highlight key sentences. Journal about my thoughts, etc... Cheesy, I know.<br />
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<b>What has been the biggest sacrifice you’ve made?</b><br />
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The biggest sacrifice that my family and I have made, which has been a huge blessing, is losing the extra income from my full-time job. I no longer have that “extra" or "secure" income. We have to manage our budgets monthly, sometimes daily, because as an entrepreneur, in the beginning stages, it takes time to build. That also applies to the financial aspect of business.<br />
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<b>What is your greatest success, or something you’re most proud of related to what you do?</b><br />
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I am sure that this is coming with age, but I am so much more confident about most decisions that I make as it relates to who I am, what I believe in, my personal needs, my family's needs, and business decisions. I no longer have to ask for anyone's opinion.<br />
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<b>Do you have a morning ritual that helps you set the tone for the day?</b><br />
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I wish I was more consistent about this, but with every season, our morning rituals and routines change a little, especially when the children are home from school in the summer. We get so lax about things. Every evening before bed I look over and check off things that I have completed, and those things that I have not, I schedule into other days. Most mornings, I look over my schedule and I try to keep my planner with me at all times to stay on task and to hold myself accountable. I do not have a realistic “routine” to be honest.<br />
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<b>How do you decompress at night?</b><br />
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I usually try to do something for myself and that usually ends up being watching a tv show, catching up on social media... Nothing super productive, right?<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhueo_2xL_zERegMY7Lp8dfUZk833YVa5WfH7Up8h-ZzVN6WHSeUF0CKi79QlCL-Zgw_SUHCLFC1OHto6ho7WlSoXXF4IvVh_dRy79pwR7aWrjXdmhEnrK_8uo1HqqIPVbYgDc3qov7RUWb/s1600/IMG_0224.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1217" data-original-width="1024" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhueo_2xL_zERegMY7Lp8dfUZk833YVa5WfH7Up8h-ZzVN6WHSeUF0CKi79QlCL-Zgw_SUHCLFC1OHto6ho7WlSoXXF4IvVh_dRy79pwR7aWrjXdmhEnrK_8uo1HqqIPVbYgDc3qov7RUWb/s400/IMG_0224.jpg" width="336" /></a></div>
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<b>What helps when you’re stuck? Do you have a motto or quote that inspires/motivates you?</b><br />
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When I am stuck I turn to my business coach, aka my sister. I have a few inspirational quotes hanging in several places around the house, but this one is my most favorite.<br />
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<b>Keep Asking, Seeking, Knocking</b><br /><b>7</b> “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.<br /><b>8</b> For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened."<br />Matthew 7:7-8 New King James Version (NKJV)</blockquote>
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<b>What does self care look like in your life?</b></div>
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Meditation, bible verse writing, and really sitting still to listen to myself and my higher power to help make sound decisions. Otherwise I am afraid that I may turn into a crazy person juggling all the things. I can feel myself getting to a crazy point before I get there. I am really great at stopping that. I wish that I could say my self care is going for a mani / pedi, a massage, etc. But I haven’t gotten there yet!</div>
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<b>Are there any women who helped pave the way for your success?</b></div>
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To name a few, my business coach, aka sister Arletta Moore, who for most of her life was a successful mechanical engineer turned empowerment engineer. Oprah, of course, for obvious reasons, and Martha Stewart.<br />
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<div>
<b>Lastly, and most important, what is your favorite TV show and what is your favorite snack?</b></div>
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My favorite tv show at the moment is <i>Fixer Upper</i>, and my favorite snack is Lacey Cookies.</div>
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<i><br /></i></div>
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<i>All photos courtesy of Porsche Pope</i><br />
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P.S. Meet last week's bitch: <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2017/08/an-interview-with-actor-and-model.html">Actor and Model, Elisabeth Donaldson</a>!<br />
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P.P.S. Full list of My Bitches <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/p/these-my-bitches.html">here</a>.</div>
The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4041456273795950735.post-39651291657912303582017-08-23T15:22:00.000-05:002018-02-01T07:28:34.229-06:00Being Vulnerable Online<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcVPKgpTlzBq5HA_5_naiEQNBdcm-kDkxGsmAi8W-Yqk9mWSGBxY6pc5-2e59MMevSe34HDKfA2MfnSX2XcgWV0_e8ZTXwXaoQ-6nfSV2y4AHNhqv1P04xpyvUBtIx9PdgmGPVVaxOFKtD/s1600/Being+Vulnerable+Online.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcVPKgpTlzBq5HA_5_naiEQNBdcm-kDkxGsmAi8W-Yqk9mWSGBxY6pc5-2e59MMevSe34HDKfA2MfnSX2XcgWV0_e8ZTXwXaoQ-6nfSV2y4AHNhqv1P04xpyvUBtIx9PdgmGPVVaxOFKtD/s400/Being+Vulnerable+Online.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>
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This year, am I right? I've had days where I've thought, okay, just do the first thing you have to do, then do the next thing, and then do the thing after that. I'll get through the day, then wake up the next day and think, oh God, I have do that all over again.<br />
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Where do you share that? Facebook is a dumpster fire, hardly anyone I know in real life is on Twitter, what Instagram-worthy picture encapsulates: hello, my life is on fire? Do I start a newsletter? <i>I Made It Through This Week: The Kim Baldwin Weekly</i>. And more importantly, will I regret it if I open up online? Are people going to judge me and talk about me behind my back?<br />
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In the ten year (!!) history of this blog, there are a lot of vulnerable, personal posts. Do I regret writing any of them? No. Have I regretted being vulnerable online? Not really. Now, I've certainly written things, hit Publish, and then spent the next thirty minutes feeling like there were fire ants pulsing through my veins. But I have never received anything other than love and support in response to showing my real self online.<br />
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This year has probably been one of, if not the, hardest years of my life. And I have written nothing about it, at least not here. Why? Because I run a client-based business. I can't tell you how many meetings I walk into where the client or potential client says, "We love your blog!" And then I walk back to my car thinking, thank God I didn't write any personal posts this year. They don't know I lost my confidence, lost myself, almost lost my marriage, secretly work at a restaurant two days a week, see two therapists, attend a weekly group meeting, and am not allowed to weigh myself. They just think I'm funny. Hooray!<br />
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I was thirty-one when I started this blog, and I didn't go into therapy until I was thirty-eight, so there are seven years of posts where I'm airing grievances or vaguely crying for help. In my defense, isn't that what your thirties are for? But now, in my (early) forties, I'm struggling with how to be vulnerable online from an older, tiny bit wiser, perspective. Do I just want to share that I'm struggling, or do I want to wait until I'm out of it, and then share what I've learned? Usually, by the time I'm out of it, I don't feel like taking about it anymore. The struggle is where my voice shows up.<br />
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Here's what I want to say. Life knocked the wind out of me last July. I made it through the year on auto-pilot, then in April, I bottomed out. I have PTSD and attachment trauma and for the first time, they were both activated at the same time. I felt so much perceived emotional and physical threat, that part of my brain clicked off. I had to get body work done (shout-out to Reiki) to release the trauma so my brain could come back online.<br />
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I've done some heavy emotional lifting in the last four months, and I'm through the darkest part, in fact, as a friend said over the weekend, "You've got your mojo back." And I do. While I've never regretted being vulnerable online, I would have regretted not sharing this.<br />
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If you're in the cave, reach out, there are a few of us who deserve, and know how, to hold space with you. A heart on an Instagram post goes a long way sometimes.<br />
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P.S. Here are <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2016/11/4-ways-to-practice-self-care.html">4 ways to practice self-care</a>.<br />
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P.P.S. Where my <a href="http://theblondemule.blogspot.com/2016/05/finding-peers-online-over-forty.html">over-forty bloggers</a> at?The Blonde Mulehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06540036388820868775noreply@blogger.com1